“But the fact remains,” the Chief Psychologist went on, “that you shared minds
with Khone who, because of an earlier sharing with Conway, gave you much of the
knowledge and experience of a Sector General Diagnostician as well as a
Gogleskan healer. You also became deeply involved on the mental level with one
of the Rhiim parasites, not to mention some earlier prying into the mind of your
Chalder friend, AUGL-One Sixteen. I’m not surprised that there are times when
you aren’t quite sure who or what you are. Is there any doubt about that at
present?”
“No,” she replied, “you are talking only to Cha Thrat.”
“Good,” O’Mara said, “because it is Cha Thrat’s problematical future that we
must now consider. Since the business on Rhabwar, when you were not only
insubordinate but completely right, the option of a career in Maintenance, even
though Timmins speaks highly ofyou, is closed, as is any hope you may have had
of service as a ship’s medic with the Monitor Corps. Shipboard discipline is
often invisible, but it is there and it is strict, and no ship commander would
risk taking on a doctor with a proven record of insubordination.
“The Cultural Contact people you’ve been helping with the Rhiim parasite,” it
continued, “are less discipline-oriented than the others, and they are impressed
with you and are grateful enough to offer you a spot on your home planet, after
the disciplinary dust has had a chance to settle, of course. What would you say
to returning to Sommaradva?”
Cha Thrat made an untranslatable sound and O’Mara said drily, “I see. But the
medical and surgical options are also closed to you. In spite of the respect in
which are held by many of the senior staff, nobody wants a know-it-all trainee
nurse on their wards who is likely to say or do something that will suggest that
its Charge Nurse or doctor on duty are, well, clinically incorrect. And while
you have influence in high places, that also could disappear if the truth about
your Gogleskan mind-swap became common knowledge.”
Cha Thrat was wondering if there was anything she could do or say that would
halt the relentless closing down of her options, when Braithwaite looked up from
its display.
“Excuse me, sir,” it said. “But from my knowledge of the personalities involved,
Conway, Rhone, and Prilicla are unlikely to discuss it among anyone but
themselves, and Murchison, who is a very intelligent entity indeed, will do
likewise when she realizes the truth or learns it from her life-mate. Her psych
profile indicates the presence of a well-developed sense of humor, and it might
well be that the thought of an other-species entity, andanother female at that,
looking upon her with the same libidinous feelings as those of her life-mate,
Conway, would be funnier than it was embarrassing. Naturally, I would not
suggest that any of these misdirected feelings would be translated into action,
but certain entertaining sexual fantasies could arise that would illuminate the
whole area of interspecies—”
“Braithwaite,” O’Mara said quietly, “it is talk like that which gives people the
wrong impression about e-t psychologists.
“As for you, Cha Thrat,” it went on, “I decided a long time ago that there was
only one position here that suited your particular talents. Once again you will
start as a trainee, at the bottom, and advancement will be slow because your
chief is very hard to please. It is a difficult and often thankless job that
will cause irritation to most people, but then you’ve become used to that. You
will have a few compensations, like being able to poke your olfactory orifices
into everyone else’s business whenever you think it necessary. Do you accept?”
Suddenly Cha Thrat’s pulse was clearly audible to her and she was finding it
difficult to breathe. “I—I don’t understand,” she said.
O’Mara took a deep breath, then exhaled through its nose and said, “You do
understand, Cha Thrat. Don’t pretend to be stupid when you aren’t.”
“I do understand,” she agreed, “and I am most grateful. The delay was due to a
combination of initial disbelief and consideration of the implications. You are
saying that I am to learn the skills of nonmaterial healing, the casting of