Then the tears erupted from her with so much force that they spilled
onto the front of the robe.
He said quietly, as calmly as he could, “Don’t shoot the messenger,
Kate. I told Luther and I’m telling you, life is way too short for this
crap. I lost both my parents a long time ago. Okay, you have reasons for
not liking the guy, fine.
That’s up to you. But the old man loves you and cares about you and
regardless of how you think he’s screwed up your life you have to
respect that love. That’s my advice to you, take it or leave it.”
He moved toward the door but she again got there before him.
“You don’t know anything about it.”
“Fine, I don’t know anything about it. Go back to bed, I’m sure you’ll
fall right asleep, nothing important on your mind.”
She grabbed his coat with such force that she jerked him around, even
though he outweighed her by eighty pounds.
“I was two years old when he went to prison for the last time. I was
nine when he got out. Do you understand the incredible shame of a little
girl whose dad is in prison? Whose dad steals other’s people’s property
for a living? When you had show-and-tell at school and the one kid’s
dad is a doctor and another’s is a truck driver and it comes to your
turn and the teacher looks down and tells the class that Katie, s dad
had to go away because he did something bad and then she’d skip to the
next kid?
“He was never there for us. Never! Mom worried sick about him all the
time. But she always kept the faith, right up until the end. She made it
easy for him.”
“She finally divorced him, Kate,” Jack gently reminded her.
“Only because that was the only choice she had left. And right when she
was just getting her life turned around, she finds a lump in her breast
and in six months she’s gone.”
Kate leaned back against the wall. She looked so tired, it was painful
to witness. “And you know what the really crazy thing is? She never
once stopped loving him. After all the incredible shit he put her
through.” Kate shook her head, having a hard time believing the words
she had just spoken. She looked up at Jack, her chin trembling slightly.
“But that’s okay, I have enough hate for both of us.” She stared at him,
a mixture of pride and righteousness on her features.
Jack didn’t know if it was the complete exhaustion he was feeling or the
fact that for so many years what he was about to say had been pent up
inside him. Years of watching this charade. And brushing it aside in
favor of the beauty and vivaciousness of the woman across from him. His
vision of perfection.
“Is that your idea of justice, Kate? Enough hate balanced against
enough love, and everything equals out?”
She stepped back. “What are you talking about?”
He moved forward as she continued to retreat into the small room. “I’ve
listened to this goddamned martyrdom of yours until I’m sick of it. You
think you’re some perfect defender of the hurt and victimized. Nothing
comes above that.
Not you, not me, not your father. The only reason you’re out there
prosecuting every sonofabitch that comes into your sights is because
your father hurt you. Every time you convict somebody that’s another
nail in your old man’s heart.”
Her hand flew to his face. He caught it, gripped it. “Your whole adult
life has been spent getting back at him. For all the wrongs. For all the
hurt. For never being there for you.”
He squeezed her hand until he heard her gasp. “Did you ever once stop to
think that maybe you were never there for him?”
He let go of her hand as she stood there, staring at him, a look on her
face he had never seen before.
“Do you understand that Luther loves you so much that he’s never tried
to contact you, never tried to be a part of your life, because he knows