“So if we fight,” Saleur asked, ‘how will you win?”
Pohlmann smiled.
“I think we can give young Wellesley a problem or two,” he said cheerfully.
“We’ll put the Rajah’s men behind some strong walls where they can’t do any damage, and we three will line our guns wheel to wheel, hammer them hard for their whole approach, then finish them off with some smart volleys. After that we’ll let the cavalry loose on their remnants.”
“But when?” Dupont asked.
“Soon,” Pohlmann said, ‘soon. Has to be soon. Buggers are eating dung for breakfast these days.” There was a sudden silence in the tent and Pohlmann realized a question had been addressed to him. Surjee Rao, a sinister man whose reputation for cruelty was as widespread as it was deserved, raised an eyebrow to the Hanoverian.
“The rain, Your Serene Excellency,” Pohlmann explained, ‘the rain deafened me so I could not hear your question.”
“What my Lord wishes to know,” the minister said, ‘is whether we can destroy the British?”
“Oh, utterly,” Pohlmann said as though it was risible to even ask the question.
“They fight hard,” Beny Singh pointed out.
“And they die like other men when fought hard in return,” Pohlmann said dismissively.
Scindia leaned forward and whispered in Surjee Rao’s ear.
“What the Lord of our land and the conqueror of our enemy’s lands wishes to know,” the minister said, ‘is how you will beat the British?”
“In the way that His Royal Highness suggested, Excellency, when he gave me his wise advice yesterday,” Pohlmann said, and it was true that he had enjoyed a private talk with Scindia the day before, though the advice had all been given by Pohlmann, but if he was to sway this durbar then he knew he must let them think that he was simply repeating Scindia’s suggestions.
“Tell us, please,” Surjee Rao, who knew full well that his master had no ideas except how to increase the tax yields, asked suavely.
“As we all know,” Pohlmann said, ‘the British have divided their forces into two parts. By now both those small armies will know that we are here at Borkardan and, because they are fools eager for death, they will both be marching towards us. Both armies lie to our south, but they are separated by some miles. They nevertheless hope to join together, then attack us, but yesterday, in his unparalleled wisdom, His Royal Highness suggested that if we move eastwards we shall draw the enemy’s eastern most column towards us and so make them march away from their allies. We can then fight the two armies in turn, defeat them in turn, and then let our dogs chew the flesh from their carcasses. And when the last enemy is dead, Excellency, I shall bring their General to our ruler’s tents in chains and send their women to be his slaves.” More to the point, Pohlmann thought, he would capture Wellesley’s food supplies, but he dared not say that in case Scindia took the words as a criticism. But Pohlmann’s bravado was rewarded by a scatter of applause that was unfortunately spoiled as a whole section of the tent roof collapsed to let in a deluge of rain.
If the British are doomed,” Surjee Rao asked when the commotion had subsided, ‘why do they advance on us?”
It was a good question, and one that had worried Pohlmann slightly, though he believed he had found an answer.
“Because, Excellency,” he said, ‘they have the confidence of fools. Because they believe that their combined armies will prove sufficient. Because they do not truly understand that our army has been trained to the same level as their own, and because their General is young and inexperienced and too eager for a reputation.”
“And you believe, Colonel, that we can keep their two armies apart?”
If we march tomorrow, yes.”
“How big is the British General’s army?”
Pohlmann smiled.
“Wellesley has five thousand infantrymen, Excellency, and six thousand cavalry. We could lose as many men as that and not even notice they were gone! He has eleven thousand men, but the only ones he relies on are his five thousand infantry. Five thousand men! Five thousand!” He paused, making sure that everyone in the tent had heard the figure.