“Well, there are lots of places, Audee. Isn’t there one you’d like better than another?”
“What I would like,” he said, “-what I think we would all like, is to have a chance to figure out what we want to do by ourselves. I guess you’ve noticed we’ve got some personal problems that need to get worked out.” That is not the kind of statement you want to agree to, and I certainly couldn’t deny it, so I just smiled. “So what we need is a chance to get off by ourselves and talk about them.”
“Ah,” I said, nodding. “I guess we didn’t give you enough time, when Essie and I left you alone?”
“You left us alone. Your friend Albert didn’t.”
“Albert?” It had never occurred to me that he would present himself to guests, especially without being invited.
“All the time, Broadhead,” said Walthers bitterly. “Sitting right where you are now. Asking Dolly a million questions.”
I shook my head and held out my glass for a refill. It probably wasn’t a good idea, but I didn’t have any ideas that I thought were good. When I was young and my mother was dying-because she couldn’t afford medical care for both of us, guilt, guilt, guilt, and decided to get it for me- there was a time when she didn’t recognize me, didn’t remember my name, talked to me as though I were her boss or the landlord or some guy she’d dated before she married my father. A bad scene. It was almost worse to have her that way than to know she was dying: a solid figure crumbling before my eyes.
The way Albert was crumbling now.
“What kind of questions did he ask?” I asked, looking at Dolly.
“Oh, about Wan,” she said, fiddling with the hand puppets but speaking with her own voice-though still without moving her lips much. “About where he was going, what he was doing. Mostly he wanted me to show him all the objects Wan was interested in on the charts.”
“Show me,” I said.
“I can’t run that thing,” she said peevishly, but Janie Yee-xing got up and was at the controls before she finished talking. She touched the display board, frowned, punched out a combination, scowled, and turned back to the rest of us.
“Mrs. Broadhead must have locked it when she took your pilot out of the circuit,” she said.
“Anyway,” said Dolly, “it was all black holes, one kind or another.”
“I thought there only was one kind,” I said, and she shrugged. We were all clustered around the control seat, looking up at the viewplate, which was showing nothing but stars. “Damn him,” I said.
And from behind us Albert’s voice said frostily, “I am sorry if I have inconvenienced you, Robin.”
We all turned like the figures in one of those old German town clocks. He was sitting on the edge of the seat I had just vacated, studying us. He looked different. Younger. Less self-assured. He was turning a cigar in his hands-cigar, not the pipe-and his expression was somber. “I thought Essie was working on you,” I said-I am sure-irritably.
“She has finished, Robin. She is coming now, in fact. I think it is fair for me to say that she found nothing wrong-isn’t that right, Mrs. Broadhead?”
Essie came in the door and stopped there. Her fists were on her hips, her eyes fastened on Albert. She didn’t even look at me.
“Is right, program,” she declared gloomily. “Have found no programming error.”
“I am glad to hear that, Mrs. Broadhead.”
“Do not be glad! Fact remains, you are one screwed-up program. So tell me, intelligent program with no fault in programming, what is next step?”
The hologram actually licked its lips nervously. “Why,” said Albert hesitantly, “I would suppose you might want to check the hardware.”
“Precisely,” said Essie as she reached to pull his datafan out of its socket. I could swear I saw a fleeting expression of panic on Albert’s face, the look of a man going under the anesthetic for major surgery. Then it disappeared with the rest of him. “Go on talking,” she ordered over her shoulder, putting a loupe in her eye and beginning to scan the surface of the fan.
But what was there to talk about? We watched while she studied every corrugation of the fan. We drifted after her when, scowling, she took the fan to her workroom, and watched silently while she touched the fan with calipers and probes, plugged it in a test socket, pressed buttons, turned verniers, read results off the scales. I stood there rubbing my belly, which had begun to be unpleasant to me again, and Audee whispered, “What’s she looking for?” But I didn’t know. A nick, a scratch, corrosion, anything, and whatever it was she didn’t find it.
She stood up, sighing. “Is nothing there,” she said.
“That’s good,” I offered.
“That’s good,” she agreed, “because if was anything serious I could not fix here. But is also bad, Robin, because is obvious that buggery program is all bugged to hell. Has taught me lesson in humility, this.”
Dolly offered, “Are you sure he’s busted, Mrs. Broadhead? While you were in the other room he seemed coherent enough. A little peculiar, maybe.”
“Peculiar! Dolly-lady, all the time I check him you know what he’s talking about? Mach’s Hypothesis. Missing mass. Black holes blacker than regular black holes. Would need to be a real Albert Einstein to understand-hey! What’s that? Was talking to you?”
And when she had heard confirmation from the others she sat with her lips compressed in thought for some time. Then she shook herself “Oh, hell,” she said dismally, “is no good to try to guess at problem. Is only one person who knows what is wrong with Albert, and that is Albert himself.”
“And what if Albert won’t tell you?” I asked.
“Is wrong question,” she said, plugging in the fan. “Proper question is ‘What if Albert can’t?’”
He looked all right-almost all right, anyway. He sat fumbling with his cigar in his favorite chair-which was also my own favorite seat, but at that moment I was not disposed to argue it with him. “Now, Albert,” she said, her tone kindly but firm, “you know you are screwed up, correct?”
“A little aberrant, I think, yes,” he said apologetically.
“Aberrant as all hell, I think! Well, now here is what we do, Albert. First we ask you some simple factual questions-not about motivations, not about hard theoretical stuff! Only questions that can be resolved by objective facts. You understand?”
“Certainly I understand, Mrs. Broadhead.”
“Right. First. Understand you were chatting with guests while Robin and I were in Captain’s Chambers.”
“That is correct, Mrs. Broadhead.”
She pursed her lips. “Strikes me as unusual behavior, no? You were questioning them. Please tell us what questions were and your answers.”
Albert shifted position uneasily. “Mostly I was interested in the objects Wan was investigating, Mrs. Broadhead. Mrs. Walthers was good enough to pick them out for me on the charts.” He pointed at the display, and when we looked at it, sure enough, it was showing a series of charts, one after another. “If you look at them carefully,” said Albert, pointing with his unsmoked cigar, “you will see that there is a definite progression. His first targets were simple black holes, which are indicated on the Heechee charts by these marks like fishhooks. Those are danger signs in the Heechee cartography.”
“How you know this?” Essie demanded, and then: “No, purge that question. I assume you have good reason for this assumption.”
“I do, Mrs. Broadhead. I have not been entirely forthcoming with you in this respect.”
“Ha! Are getting somewhere! Now continue.”
“Yes, Mrs. Broadhead. The simple black holes each had two check marks. Then Wan investigated a naked singularity-a nonrotating black hole, in fact the one that Robin himself had such a terrible experience with many years ago. It was there that he found Gelle-Klara Moynlin.” The image flickered, then showed the naked blue ghost star before returning to the chart. “This one has three fishhooks, meaning more danger. And finally”-wave of the hand, the picture altering to show a different section of the Heechee chart-“this is the one Mrs. Walthers identified for me as the one Wan was heading for next.”
“I didn’t say that!” Dolly objected.
“No, Mrs. Walthers,” Albert agreed, “but you did say that he looked at it frequently, that he discussed it with his Dead Men, and that it terrified him. I believe that it is the one he is aiming at.”
“Very fine,” applauded Essie. “Have passed first test admirably, Albert. Now will proceed with second part, without, this time, participation from audience,” she added, .glancing at Dolly.
“I’m at your service, Mrs. Broadhead.”
“To be sure you are. Now. Factual questions. What is meant by term missing mass?”
Albert looked uneasy, but he responded promptly enough. “The so-called missing mass is that quantity of mass which would account for various galactic orbits, but has never been observed.”