Kren of the Mitchegai by Leo Frankowski and Dave Grossman

While waiting for her to regain consciousness, Bronki looked around the shop.

“She really does very nice work. With the right training, I think that she could become a truly fine artist. I want you to be sure not to kill her, Kren.”

“I hadn’t intended to.”

“Excellent. Good artists are really very rare. Oh, here’s your brand, Kren. I think that you might be well advised to take it back with you, since it wouldn’t be a good idea for you to trust her again.”

“Agreed. She’s coming around.”

“Right. Now then, my fine young artist, besides failing to give Kren here the anesthetic that he paid for, you also kept a copy of his credit card number, and you sold that number to someone. We would like to know why you did that, and who you sold the number to.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“Yes, you do. We know that you know, and you know that we know that you know. Now, tell us who they are.”

“I can’t do that. They’d kill me if I told you.”

“Perhaps, but they would have to catch you first, whereas we have already caught you. In addition, our methods will probably be a lot more painful than theirs might be. Please reconsider.”

“You don’t know who you’re messing with, lady!”

“True. But then, neither do you. Kren, please hurt her.”

“With pleasure!”

Kren picked up a branding plate from the shelf and took it to the induction furnace.

“No, use this one instead,” Bronki said, handing him a different branding plate. “It’s realy much nicer.”

“As you wish.”

He placed the branding plate into the oven and pressed a button as he’d seen the brander do. In a moment, the plate was glowing bright yellow. Picking it up with the long pliers, he held it over her chest.

“Last chance,” he said.

“Don’t you see that I can’t!”

“I was hoping that you’d say that.”

Kren placed it carefully over her fourth lung and dropped it. The brander screamed loudly as he counted to ten, and then pulled the brand off the smoking skin.

Bronki poured some water on the wound and said, “Kren, that scream was one of the nicest I’ve ever heard! I think I’ll put some branding irons around the party snacks the next time I have guests over.

“Now then, young lady, would you like to tell us what we wish to know?”

“Go fry your brains!”

“Kren, again, please. Use this plate.”

The brander proved to be remarkably stubborn, as Kren burned a different brand over her third lung.

The first two lungs are in back, behind the spinal column. The Mitchegai rib cage is fastened at the neck, and kept centered by the diaphragm.

It soon became necessary to put two more brands on her abdomen. It was only when he placed a hot branding plate between her legs, searing shut her cloaca, that she finally broke down.

Like Earthly birds, the female Mitchegai have a single orifice at the bottom for the elimination of dung, urine, and eggs. The males have an additional orifice that periodically sprays small amounts of sperm into the air. The areas concerned with defecation and reproduction are very sensitive on Mitchegai, as they are on humans.

“Just kill me and get it over with,” the brander gasped.

“My dear, we don’t want to kill you. We want to kill the criminals that you gave Kren’s number to. Once we’re gone, you can go into hiding for a few weeks, and after that, it is most likely that those who might have been after you will be dead, and you will be safe.”

“Why didn’t you say that before?”

“I suppose that I should have, but Kren was having such a nice time. You really picked the wrong person to withhold an anesthetic from,” Bronki said.

“A girl has to have a little fun.”

“And now you’ve paid for your fun. Well then, who wanted Kren’s number?”

“Kodo,” the brander said.

“Indeed? This is interesting. Now, tell me the whole story from the very beginning. I want you to be very complete, and very honest, because if we decide that you are lying, Kren will turn you over and work on your back side. There is room for six brands back there, and you would find sleeping very difficult for a week or two, if you tell us any lies. Do you understand?”

“Yes, madam.”

The brander was a half hour getting the whole sordid tale out. It started with her losing a large gambling bet, followed by more betting in a vain attempt to recoup her losses. Soon, she was forced to borrow money, and then to borrow more money to pay back the first loans. Then Kodo had bought up her debts, and at first only wanted a few small favors done, in addition to regular repayments on her debt. In time the favors became larger, and more illegal, and were backed up by Kodo’s threat of going to the authorities and telling them of her past crimes, if she didn’t commit further ones.

“I see,” Bronki said. “How did they know that Kren was coming here?”

“I don’t think that they did. I think that they were following him. They came in right after he left. They had jimmied my card reader half a year ago, so it always remembers every number that I read through it. It was one of the little favors they had me doing for them.”

“And why did Kodo want to harm me?”

“You are Bronki, aren’t you? You were the only other bidder going up against him on a piece of development property. With you gone, he would have been able to buy it at a much lower price.”

“Yes, the Naga property. I didn’t think that Kodo was that serious about buying it. Actually, I’d already submitted my top bid. I wouldn’t have gone any higher. There was no need for all of this at all. I guess we can add stupidity to Kodo’s other crimes. Okay, you are telling the truth. Kren, unstrap her, and let’s get out of here.”

“If I unstrap her, she’ll take a shot of anesthetic and be out of her pain. I had to suffer for days.”

“Now, don’t be spiteful. You’ve already given her five brands to your two, and the ones she got were much deeper than usual. Anyway, she has to be able to move in order to go into hiding.”

“If you insist,” Kren said.

“I do. As for you, young lady, remember that it is in your best interest if we kill Kodo. Dead, he won’t be able to come after you for betraying him, and furthermore, you will be out from under all of your debts to him. I really like your art work, incidentally. You know where to find me. If you live through this, and should you decide to further your academic study of art, please feel free to look me up. I may be able to help you. I happen to have considerable influence at the university.”

The brander looked at Kren and said, “Is she really serious?”

“Oddly enough, I believe that she is.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

The Welcome Stranger

New Yugoslavia, 2211 a.d.

The machinery had been bought from Earth, massive amounts of raw materials had been purchased and stockpiled, the initial work had been done, and the first of sixty ships that would form our Distant Early Warning Sphere, two light-years out from New Yugoslavia’s sun, had just been launched. We’d be building about one a week from this time on.

I felt the need to relax alone and congratulate myself.

On rare occasions, perhaps once every two months, I like to sit down with a bottle of sour mash bourbon, and drink alone.

I was indulging in this weakness when a bright blue crab walked into my den. It was as big around as a large dinner plate, fairly thick, and had six very strange legs, but it was a crab.

I’d seen one once before, on a remote island on my honeymoon. I’d assumed that it was part of the original ecology of New Yugoslavia, even though it wasn’t listed as such. I had it put into a carboy of ninety-five percent ethanol to preserve it, intending to ship it to a university for study. Soon, it somehow managed to drink twice its weight of the 190 proof booze, cut a neat, circular hole in the metal lid of the carboy, and then walk back to the ocean.

So, I was sure that I wasn’t hallucinating. But just to be surer, I said, “Agnieshka?”

“Yeah, I see him too, boss. He’s for real,” her voice said from what looked like a stand of medieval armor.

“So. Hi there, little fellow! Are you the same guy that I met on a beach, seven years ago?”

“In fact, I am, sir,” it, or I suppose, he said. “I’ve long wanted to thank you for your kindness, that day. To find a total, alien stranger, to have the wisdom to understand what I so badly needed, and then to have the kindness to give it to me in such munificent quantities, well, it goes beyond all normal measures of nobility. My offspring and I will forever be in your debt.” He said this in perfect Kashubian.

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