‘Why only the past, Lord Ulric?’
‘It is all you have left, my friend.’
29
At midnight, as the flames from the funeral pyre blazed against the night sky, the Nadir horde drew their weapons, holding them aloft in silent tribute to the warrior whose soul, they believed, stood at the gates of Paradise.
Rek and the company of Drenai followed suit, then he turned and bowed to Ulric. Ulric returned the bow and the company set off to return to the postern gate of Wall Five. The return journey was made in silence, each man’s thoughts his own.
Bowman thought of Caessa, and of her death at Druss’s side. He had loved her in his way, though never spoke of it. To love her was to die.
Hogun’s mind reeled with the awesome picture of the Nadir army seen from close range; numberless and mighty. Unstoppable!
Serbitar thought of the journey he would make with the remnants of The Thirty at dusk on the morrow. Only Arbedark would be missing, for they had convened the night before and declared him an Abbot. Now he would journey from Delnoch alone to found a new temple in Ventria.
Rek fought against despair. Ulric’s last words echoed again and again in his mind:
‘Tomorrow you will see the Nadir as never before. We have paid homage to your courage by attacking only in daylight, allowing you to rest at night. Now I need to take your Keep and there will be no rest until it falls, Day and night we will come at you until none are left alive to oppose us.’
Silently the group mounted the postern steps, making their way to the mess hall. Rek knew sleep would not come to him this night. It was his last night upon the earth, and his tired body summoned fresh reserves so that he could taste life and know the sweetness of drawing breath.
The group sat around a trestle table and Rek poured wine. Of The Thirty, only Serbitar and Vintar remained. For many minutes the five men said little, until at last Hogun broke the uncomfortable silence.
‘We knew it would come to this, did we not? There was no way to hold indefinitely.’
‘Very true, old horse,’ said Bowman. ‘Still, it is a trifle disappointing, don’t you think? I must own that I always kept alive a small hope that we would succeed. Now that it is gone, I feel a tiny twinge of panic.’ He smiled gently, and finished his drink at a single swallow.
‘You are not pledged to stay,’ said Hogun.
‘True. Perhaps I will leave in thejnorning.’
‘I don’t think you will – though I don’t know why,’ said Hogun.
‘Well, if truth be told, I promised that Nadir warrior, Kaska, that I would have another drink with him once they took the Keep. Nice chap – if a trifle maudlin in his cups. He has six wives and twenty-three children. It is a wonder he has the time to come to war.’
‘Or the strength!’ added Hogun, grinning. ‘And what of you, Rek. Why do you stay?’
‘Hereditary stupidity,’ answered Rek.
‘That is not enough,’ said Bowman. ‘Come on, Rek – the truth, if you please.’
Rek scanned the group swiftly, noting the fatigue on all their faces and realising for the first time that he loved them all.
His eyes met Vintar’s and understanding flowed between them. The older man smiled.
‘I think,’ said Rek, ‘that only the Abbot of Swords can answer that question – for all of us.’
Vintar nodded and closed his eyes for several moments. Each man knew he was searching their hearts and minds, yet there was no fear, no embarrassment, no desire any longer to be alone.
‘All things that live must die,’ said Vintar. ‘Man alone, it seems, lives all his life in the knowledge of death. And yet there is more to life than merely waiting for death. For life to have meaning, there must be a purpose. A man must pass something on -otherwise he is useless.
‘For most men, that purpose revolves around marriage and children who will carry on his seed. For others it is an ideal – a dream, if you like. Each of us here believes in the concept of honour: that it is man’s duty to do that which is right and just; that might alone is not enough. We have all transgressed at some time. We have stolen, lied, cheated – even killed – for our own ends. But ultimately we return to our beliefs. We do not allow the Nadir to pass unchallenged because we cannot. We judge ourselves more harshly than others can judge us. We know that death is preferable to betrayal of that which we hold dear.