“And you lost,” said Yama.
“Yes, I did, didn’t I? But it was quite a showing we gave them, wasn’t it? You, deathgod, were my charioteer. It all comes back to me now. We were taken prisoner and the Lords of Karma were to be our judges. You escaped them by the will-death and the Way of the Black Wheel. I could not.”
“That is correct. Your past was laid out before them. You were judged.” Yama regarded the monks who now sat upon the floor, their heads bowed, and he lowered his voice. “To have you to die the real death would have made you a martyr. To have permitted you to walk the world, in any form, would have left the door open for your return. So, as you stole your teachings from the Gottama of another place and time, did they steal the tale of the end of that one’s days among men. You were judged worthy of Nirvana. Your atman was projected, not into another body, but into the great magnetic cloud that encircles this planet. That was over half a century ago. You are now officially an avatar of Vishnu, whose teachings were misinterpreted by some of his more zealous followers. You, personally, continued to exist only in the form of self-perpetuating wavelengths, which I succeeded in capturing.”
Sam closed his eyes.
“And you dared to bring me back?”
“That is correct.”
“I was aware of my condition the entire time.”
“I suspected as much.”
His eyes opened, blazing. “Yet you dared recall me from that?”
“Yes.”
Sam bowed his head. “Rightly are you called deathgod, Yama-Dharma. You have snatched away from me the ultimate experience. You have broken upon the dark stone of your will that which is beyond all comprehension and mortal splendor. Why could you not have left me as I was, in the sea of being?”
“Because a world has need of your humility, your piety, your great teaching and your Machiavellian scheming.”
“Yama, I’m old,” he said. “I’m as old as man upon this world. I was one of the First, you know. One of the very first to come here, to build, to settle. All of the others are dead now, or are gods — dei ex machini. . . The chance was mine also, but I let it go by. Many times. I never wanted to be a god, Yama. Not really. It was only later, only when I saw what they were doing, that I began to gather what power I could to me. It was too late, though. They were too strong. Now I just want to sleep the sleep of ages, to know again the Great Rest, the perpetual bliss, to hear the songs the stars sing on the shores of the great sea.”
Ratri leaned forward and looked into his eyes. “We need you, Sam,” she said.
“I know, I know,” he told her. “It’s the eternal recurrence of the anecdote. You’ve a willing horse, so flog him another mile.” But he smiled as he said it, and she kissed his brow.
Tak leaped into the air and bounced upon the bed.
“Mankind rejoices,” observed the Buddha.
Yama handed him a robe and Ratri fitted him with slippers.
Recovering from the peace which passeth understanding takes time. Sam slept. Sleeping, he dreamed; dreaming, he cried out, or just cried. He had no appetite; but Yama had found him a body both sturdy and in perfect health, one well able to bear the psychosomatic conversion from divine withdrawal.
But he would sit for an hour, unmoving, staring at a pebble or a seed or a leaf. And on these occasions, he could not be aroused. Yama saw in this a danger, and he spoke of it with Ratri and Tak. “It is not good that he withdraw from the world in this way, now,” he said. “I have spoken with him, but it is as if I addressed the wind. He cannot recover that which he has left behind. The very attempt is costing him his strength.”
“Perhaps you misread his efforts,” said Tak.
“What mean you?”
“See how he regards the seed he has set before him? Consider the wrinkling at the edges of his eyes.”