‘I don’t suppose there’s a hero’s welcome awaiting me anywhere,’ I said.
‘Hardly,’ he said.
‘Any news of my parents?’ I said.
‘I’m sorry to tell you ĄX ‘ he said, ‘they died four months ago.’
‘Both?’ I said.
‘Your father first-your mother twenty-four hours later. Heart both times,’ he said.
I cried a little about that, shook my head. ‘Nobody told them what I was really doing?’ I said.
‘Our radio station in the heart of Berlin was worth more than the peace of mind of two old people,’ he said.
‘I wonder,’ I said.
‘You’re entitled to wonder,’ he said. ‘I’m not.’
‘How many people knew what I was doing?’ I said.
‘The good things or the bad things?’ he said.
‘The good,’ I said.
‘Three of us,’ he said.
‘That’s all?’ I said.
‘That’s a lot,’ he said. Too many, really. There was me, there was General Donovan, and one other.’
‘Three people in all the world knew me for what I was ĄX ‘ I said. ‘And all the rest ĄX ‘ I shrugged.
‘They knew you for what you were, too,’ he said abruptly.
‘That wasn’t me,’ I said, startled by his sharpness.
‘Whoever it was’ said Wirtanen, ‘he was one of the most vicious sons of bitches who ever lived.’
I was amazed. Wirtanen was sincerely bitter.
‘You give me hell for that ĄX knowing what you do?’ I said. ‘How else could I have survived?’
‘That was your problem,’ he said. ‘Very few men could have solved it as thoroughly as you did.’
‘You think I was a Nazi?’ I said.
‘Certainly you were,’ he said. ‘How else could a responsible historian classify you? Let me ask you a question’
‘Ask away,’ I said.
‘If Germany had won, had conquered the world ĄX ‘ he stopped, cocked his head. ‘You must be way ahead of me. You must know what the question is.’
‘How would I have lived?’ I said. ‘What would I have felt? What would I have done?’
‘Exactly,’ he said. ‘You must have thought about it, with an imagination like yours.’
‘My imagination isn’t what it used to be,’ I said. ‘One of the first things I discovered when I became an agent was that I couldn’t afford an imagination any more.’
‘No answer to my question?’ he said.
‘Now is as good a time as any to see if I’ve got any imagination left,’ I said. ‘Give me a minute or two ĄX ‘
‘Take all the time you want,’ he said.
So I projected myself into the situation he described, and what was left of my imagination gave me a corrosively cynical answer. ‘There is every chance,’ I said, ‘that I would have become a sort of Nazi Edgar Guest, writing a daily column of optimistic doggerel for daily papers around the world. And, as senility set in, the sunset of life, as they say ĄX I might even come to believe what my couplets said: that everything was probably all for the best.’
I shrugged. ‘Would I have shot anybody? I doubt it, Would I have organized a bomb plot? That’s more of a possibility; but I’ve heard a lot of bombs go off in my time, and they never impressed me much as a way to get things done. Only one thing can I guarantee you: I would never have written a play again. That skill, such as it was, is lost.
The only chance of my doing something really violent in favor of truth or justice or what have you,’ I said to my Blue Fairy Godmother, ‘would lie in my going homicidally insane. That could happen. In the situation you suggest, I might suddenly run amok with a deadly weapon down a peaceful street on an ordinary day. But whether the killing I did would improve the world much would be a matter of dumb luck, pure and simple.
‘Have I answered your question honestly enough for you?’ I asked him.
‘Yes, thank you,’ he said.
‘Classify me as a Nazi,’ I said tiredly. ‘Classify away. Hang me, if you think it would tend to raise the general level of morality. This life is no great treasure. I have no postwar plans.’
‘I only want you to understand how little we can do for you,’ he said. ‘I see you do understand.’
‘How little?’ I said.
‘A false identity, a few red herrings, transportation to wherever you might conceivably start a new life ĄX ‘ he said. ‘Some cash. Not much, but some.’
‘Cash?’ I said. ‘How was the cash value of my services arrived at?’
‘A matter of custom,’ he said, ‘a custom going back to at least the Civil War.’
‘Oh?’ I said.
‘Private’s pay,’ he said. ‘On my say-so, you’re entitled to it for the period from when we met in the Tiergarten to the present.’
‘That’s very generous,’ I said.
‘Generosity doesn’t amount to much in this business,’ he said. ‘The really good agents aren’t interested in money at all, Would it make any difference to you if we gave you the back pay of a brigadier general?’
‘No,’ I said.
‘Or if we paid you nothing at all?’
‘No difference,’ I said.
‘It’s almost never money,’ he said. ‘Or patriotism, either.’
‘What is it, then?’ I said.
‘Each person has to answer that question for himself ĄX ‘ said Wirtanen. ‘Generally speaking, espionage offers each spy an opportunity to go crazy in a way he finds irresistible.’
‘Interesting,’ I said emptily.
He clapped his hands to break the mood. ‘Now then ĄX ‘ he said, ‘about transportation: where to?’
‘Tahiti?’ I said.
‘If you say so,’ he said. ‘I suggest New York. You can lose yourself there without any trouble, and there’s plenty of work, if you want it’
‘All right ĄX New York,’ I said.
‘Let’s get your passport picture taken. You’ll be on a plane out of here inside of three hours,’ he said.
We crossed the deserted parade ground together, dust devils spinning here and there. It was my fancy to think of the dust devils as the spooks of former cadets at the school, killed in war, returning now to whirl and dance on the parade ground alone, to dance in as unmilitary a fashion as they damn well pleased.
‘When I told you there were only three people who knew about your coded broadcasts ĄX ‘ said Wirtanen.
‘What about it?’ I said.
‘You didn’t ask who the third one was,’ he said.
‘Would it be anybody I’d ever heard of?’ I said.
‘Yes,’ he said. ‘He’s dead now, I’m sorry to say. You used to attack him regularly in your broadcasts.’
‘Oh?’ I said.
‘The man you called Franklin Delano Rosenfeld,’ said Wirtanen. ‘He used to listen to you gleefully every night’
33: Communism Rears Its Head …
The third time I met my Blue Fairy Godmother, and the last time, from all indications, was, as I have said, in a vacant shop across the street from the house of Jones, across the street from where Resi, George Kraft and I were hiding.
I took my time about going into that dark place, expecting, with reason, to find anything from an American Legion color guard to a platoon of Israeli paratroopers waiting to capture me inside.
I had a pistol with me, one of the Iron Guard’s Lugers, chambered for twenty-two’s. I had it not in my pocket but in the open, loaded and cocked, ready to go. I scouted the front of the shop without showing myself. The front was dark. And then I approached the back in short rushes, from cluster to cluster of garbage cans.
Anybody trying to jump me, to jump Howard W. Campbell, Jr., would have been filled with little holes, as though by a sewing machine. And I must say that I came to love the infantry, anybody’s infantry, in that series of rushes and taking cover.
Man, I think, is an infantry animal.
There was a light in the back of the shop. I looked through a window and saw a scene of great serenity. Colonel Frank Wirtanen, my Blue Fairy Godmother, was sitting on a table again, waiting for me again.
He was an old, old man now, as sleek and hairless as Buddha.
I went in.
‘I thought surely you would have retired by now,’ I said.
‘I did ĄX ‘ he said, ‘eight years ago. Built a house on a lake in Maine with an axe and my own two hands. I was called out of retirement as a specialist’
‘In what?’ I said.
‘In you,’ he said.
‘Why the sudden interest in me?’ I said.
‘That’s what I’m supposed to find out,’ he said.
‘No mystery why the Israelis would want me,’ I said.
‘1 agree,’ he said. ‘But there’s a lot of mystery about why the Russians should think you were such a fat prize.’
‘Russians?’ I said. ‘What Russians?’
‘The girl, Resi Noth ĄX and the old man, the painter, the one called George Kraft,’ said Wirtanen. ‘They’re both communist agents. We’ve been watching the one who calls himself Kraft now since 1941. We made it easy for the girl to get into the country just to find out what she hoped to do.’