Myth-ion Improbable by Robert Lynn Asprin

Aahz looked at the map. “Probably every spell ever put up by any of Count Bovine’s people will be broken.”

“My people will have their minds and free will back,” Harold said.

“Yeah,” I said, “and every vampire will suddenly be around every day of every month.”

“Half of the population of vampires will be dead moments after they turn from cows,” Aahz said. “And all the others will be without resources, clothes, shelter, and food, with the sun coming quickly.”

“Do you think my people will remember all the years of having to submit to the round-up?” Harold asked.

“I have no doubt,” Aahz said. “You still remember it before you were rescued from here, don’t you?”

Harold nodded. “My people will hunt down and kill most of the remaining vampires.”

“And you’ll be free to leave,” I said.

“If we can break the vampire hold on my world, I won’t want to leave,” Harold said. “I’ll stay here and help my people rebuild.”

I shook my head. It was all fine and good to plan what people would do if we succeeded, but I sure didn’t see that happening any time soon.

“So no one has answered the question yet of how we stop that flow.”

I didn’t even want to try to bring up the point of getting down to that spot in the castle. We were way up at the top, and that breach in the main flow was way down in a sub-basement, where I doubted anyone had been in centuries.

“Gold,” Glenda said, her voice sounding tired and worn. “Gold would stop the flow, if you could focus enough of it.”

Aahz seemed to be off somewhere inside his head, thinking. Tanda was doing the same thing.