Sara Douglass – The Axis Trilogy 3 – StarMan

Yes, Sigholt was a good idea. She would enjoy going back there briefly, and it would not delay her too long. A few days, perhaps, at worst.

And it will give us time to speak with you, Azhure.

The voice echoed about the chamber and Azhure’s head lifted, her eyes stunned. No-one else reacted to anything but the surprised look on her face.

“Azhure?” Ysgryff asked. “What is it?”

Time alone in the snow will give you time to grow.

Adamon! Azhure breathed to herself. Yes, perhaps this would be the best plan. To Sigholt first with Rivkah, Cazna and the children…and then she could travel south-west by herself…alone . . . time to grow.

And, then, when she met Axis …

“Azhure?” Rivkah asked. “What do you mean, ‘We are not going to ride’?”

Azhure smiled secretively. “We will leave in the morning, Rivkah. Pack a small bag with what you want to take to Sigholt, something you can carry yourself, and then we shall go boating.”

“Boating?” Rivkah was getting cross now, suspecting that Azhure was trying to trick her, perhaps leave in the middle of the night without them.

“Spiredore!” Caelum cried, and Azhure laughed and rumpled his curls. “Yes, my love. Spiredore shall take us to Sigholt.”

After they had talked some more, Azhure sharing the tale of the birth of the twins (which she glossed over as briefly as she could) and of the wonder of Temple Mount and the Temple itself, and eaten the light meal that the servants carried in, Cazna and Ysgryff left. Imibe took Caelum off for a nap, but Rivkah hung back.

As the door closed behind the others, Rivkah sat closer to Azhure. “Well, Azhure,” she said. “What has happened to you?”

Azhure shrugged, wondering how much Rivkah’s natural perception had seen. “I have but grown up, Rivkah.”

Rivkah smiled. “More than that, I think. You have acquired something much more than maturity. But tell me, what did you find out about Niah?”

“Oh, Rivkah.” She took the woman’s hand. For so long Rivkah had been the only one who had known of Azhure’s yearning for her mother, and now Azhure was happy to share what she had discovered. She told her of Niah’s letter and of what the First had said. She told Rivkah of the Temple and of the wondrous jade latticework roof of the Dome of the Stars -which the First had finally shown her – but she did not tell her of WolfStar and of his claim that he truly did love Niah and that she would be reborn. And she did not tell Rivkah of the night she had spent cradled in StarDrifter’s arms.

Rivkah wept, and finally hugged Azhure tightly to her. “I am so glad,” she murmured, “that you have found so much of your mother, Azhure. Treasure that letter always.

“And now,” she leaned back, “tell me of those children. Was the birth as easy as you intimated? I saw Ysgryff shoot you some sharp looks. Tell me what truly happened.”

Too perceptive, Azhure decided, but she sat and obediently told Rivkah of the true nature of the birth. “I was pleased to be rid of them, Rivkah, and I hate myself for feeling that way…but they were as pleased to be rid of me, too. And, yes, those names – StarDrifter picked them, not I or Axis.”

“And how is StarDrifter?” Rivkah asked, her eyebrows raised archly.

Azhure laughed. “We have become good friends, Rivkah, finally. Whatever tension was between us has dissipated. Without StarDrifter’s love and friendship I would not have managed.”

“And…?”

“And what?” Azhure said crossly, defensively.

“What about you, Azhure?” Rivkah said. “You are changed. Different. But,” she grinned, “still the same even-tempered girl I knew beforehand.”

Azhure relaxed enough to laugh. “Yes, I have changed, Rivkah, and learned more about myself. But…I want to talk to Axis first. Do you mind? This concerns him as well.”

“No, of course not. Azhure …”

Rivkah’s voice trailed off and Azhure looked at her. “Rivkah? What’s wrong?”

Rivkah looked at her hands knotted in her lap. She took a breath, then looked up, meeting Azhure in the eye. “Azhure, I’m over three months gone with child.”

Azhure felt a bone-sapping chill creep through her. “For a human woman you’re too old to be carrying a child,” she said finally, tersely.

For a human woman? Rivkah wondered at the phrasing, then decided it was only Azhure’s Icarii blood talking.

“Yes,” she said, “I am. This child is a gift.”

“A gift?”

“After Faraday left you and Axis, the day she healed you, she drew me out into the corridor to say farewell. Azhure, we were close, even though we had not known each other long. We had both been Duchess of Ichtar, and as such we had both suffered, and that pulled us together. And we both loved Enchanters, and suffered because of that, too.”

“And?”

Azhure’s eyes were cold, and Rivkah did not totally blame her. “And Faraday gave me a gift. From the Mother, she said. She kissed me, and when she drew back I felt such a feeling of well-being, of vitality, flood through me that I could hardly breathe. She gave me the strength to conceive this child; that night, I think. Azhure, Magariz deserves an heir. Be pleased for us.”

“Axis does not deserve another brother!” Azhure said tightly. “Brothers have given him nothing but trouble and suffering . . . and you would bring another into the world to plague him?” Neither doubted that the child would be male.

Both women stared at each other, then looked away, hating the distance between them.

“Rivkah,” Azhure said finally, and reached out for the other woman’s hand. “I do not begrudge you your happiness, but -”

“But how awkward it is to have a mother capable of still birthing a rival,” Rivkah finished for her, bitterly, withdrawing her hand. “Axis thought he was the last of the royal line of Achar. Well, he’ll have to think again.” She tilted her head back defiantly. “I will do anything to protect this child, Azhure, anything*.”

Protect him against Axis) Azhure wondered, but said nothing. Damn Axis for being so sentimental that he’d given Rivkah the golden circlet and amethyst ring of Achar’s royal office. He should have had them melted down for the trouble they were. Now this legitimate brother would inherit not only royal blood, but insignia as well, and would prove a natural rallying point for every Acharite unhappy with the new order.

“Damn you, Rivkah!”

Rivkah seized Azhure’s shoulders and shook her, her own eyes as fierce as Azhure’s now. “Swear to me, Azhure, that you will never harm this child! Swear to me!”

Azhure stared at her.

“As you love me, Azhure, swear it\”

Azhure’s shoulders slowly lost some of their tension. “I swear, Rivkah, that I will never harm this child…so long as he does not challenge Axis! If he does, then know that I will stand with Axis and this vow I make to you now will become meaningless.”

Rivkah nodded tightly and let her hands drop. “I would not expect you to let the child come between you and Axis, Azhure. I accept your vow.”

Azhure relaxed. “Now I know why you were so desperate to rejoin Magariz. He does not know?”

Rivkah shook her head. “It was why I originally planned to ride north, Azhure. But this news of Axis …” her face fell and, forgetting the earlier animosity between them, both women wrapped their arms about each other and wept.

“Azhure,” Rivkah said finally, wiping her eyes, “do you know that this will be my first legitimate child?”

Azhure blinked, bewildered. “But Borneheld …”

Rivkah smiled and told Azhure what she and Magariz had told no-one previously. That she had bribed an old Brother of the Seneschal to marry her and Magariz. “We were so young,” she said quietly, “and all we had was one night. Poor Magariz, for years he wondered if Borneheld was his son.”

“And you told no-one of this?” Azhure was aghast.

Rivkah laughed. “What good would it have done, Azhure? The Brother was so old he would have died within a year or two, and there would have been no other way to substantiate the marriage.”

“You never told StarDrifter?”

“No. What was the point? It would not have interested him one way or the other.”

Azhure laughed. “Poor Borneheld. Not knowing all those years that he, too, was a bastard. And commanding his mother’s husband!”

“Azhure,” Rivkah’s laughter died, “will you stand by me?”

“Yes, Rivkah. Yes, I will.”

Back to the Sacred Grove That night, as Faraday travelled back to the Sacred Grove to collect more seedlings, she found Azhure sitting waiting for her in the centre of the grassy circle, Caelum playing at her feet, and several of the Horned Ones seated with her, chatting about the intricacies of the Star Dance.