THE SECOND QUARTER
The letter Toby had received from Alderman Cute, was addressed to a great man in the great district of the town. The greatest district of the town. It must have been the greatest district of the town, because it was commonly called “the world” by its inhabitants. The letter positively seemed heavier in Toby’s hand, than another letter. Not because the Alderman had sealed it with a very large coat of arms and no end of wax, but because of the weighty name on the superscription, and the ponderous amount of gold and silver with which it was associated. ‘How different from us!’ thought Toby, in all sim- plicity and earnestness, as he looked at the direction. ‘Divide the lively turtles in the bills of mortality, by the number of gentlefolks able to buy ’em; and whose share does he take but his own! As to snatching tripe from anybody’s mouth — he’d scorn it!’ With the involuntary homage due to such an ex- alted character, Toby interposed a corner of his apron between the letter and his fingers ‘His children,’ said Trotty, and a mist rose before his eyes; ‘his daughters — Gentlemen may win their hearts and marry them; they may be happy wives and mothers; they may be handsome like my dar- ling M — e –‘ He couldn’t finish the name. The final letter swelled in his throat, to the size of the whole alphabet. ‘Never mind,’ thought Trotty. ‘I know what I mean. That’s more than enough for me.’ And with this consolatory rumination, trotted on. It was a hard frost, that day. The air was bracing, crisp, and clear. The wintry sun, though powerless for warmth, looked brightly down upon the ice it was too weak to melt, and set a radiant glory there. At other times, Trotty might have learned a poor man’s lesson from the wintry sun; but he was past that, now. The Year was Old, that day. The patient Year had lived through the reproaches and misuses of its slanderers, and faithfully performed its work. Spring, summer, autumn, winter. It had laboured through the destined round, and now laid down its weary head to die. Shut out from hope, high impulse, active happiness, itself, but active messenger of many joys to others, it made appeal in its decline to have its toiling days and patient hours remembered, and to die in peace. Trotty might have read a poor man’s alle- gory in the fading year; but he was past that, now. And only he? Or has the like appeal been ever made, by seventy years at once upon an English labourer’s head, and made in vain! The streets were full of motion, and the shops were decked out gaily. The New Year, like an Infant Heir to the whole world, was waited for, with wel- comes, presents, and rejoicings. There were books and toys for the New Year, glittering trinkets for the New Year, dresses for the New Year, schemes of fortune for the New Year; new inventions to beguile it. Its life was parcelled out in almanacks and pocket- books; the coming of its moons, and stars, and tides, was known beforehand to the moment; all the work- ings of its seasons in their days and nights, were calculated with as much precision as Mr. Filer could work sums in men and women. The New Year, the New Year. Everywhere the New Year! The Old Year was already looked upon as dead; and its effects were selling cheap, like some drowned mariner’s aboard ship. Its patterns were Last Year’s, and going at a sacrifice, before its breath was gone. Its treasures were mere dirt, beside the riches of its unborn successor! Trotty had no portion, to his thinking, in the New Year or the Old. ‘Put ’em down, Put ’em down! Facts and Fig- ures, Facts and Figures! Good old Times, Good old Times! Put ’em down, Put ’em down!’ — his trot went to that measure, and would fit itself to noth- ing else. But, even that one, melancholy as it was, brought him, in due time, to the end of his journey. To the mansion of Sir Joseph Bowley, Member of Parliament. The door was opened by a Porter. Such a Porter! Not of Toby’s order. Quite another thing. His place was the ticket though; not Toby’s. This Porter underwent some hard panting before he could speak; having breathed himself by coming incautiously out of his chair, without first taking time to think about it and compose his mind. When he had found his voice — which it took him a long time to do, for it was a long way off, and hidden under a load of meat — he said in a fat whisper, ‘Who’s it from?’ Toby told him. ‘You’re to take it in, yourself,’ said the Porter pointing to a room at the end of a long passage opening from the hall. ‘Everything goes straight in, on this day of the year. You’re not a bit too soon: for, the carriage is at the door now, and they have only come to town for a couple of hours, a’ purpose.’ Toby wiped his feet (which were quite dry already) with great care, and took the way pointed out to him; observing as he went that it was an awfully grand house, but hushed and covered up, as if the family were in the country. Knocking at the room- door, he was told to enter from within; and doing so found himself in a spacious library, where, at a table strewn with files and papers, were a stately lady in a bonnet; and a not very stately gentleman in black who wrote from her dictation; while another, and an older, and a much statelier gentleman, whose hat and cane were on the table, walked up and down, with one hand in his breast, and looked complacently from time to time at his own picture — a full length; a very full length — hanging over the fireplace. ‘What is this?’ said the last-named gentleman. ‘Mr. Fish, will you have the goodness to attend?’ Mr. Fish begged pardon, and taking the letter from Toby, handed it, with great respect. ‘From Alderman Cute, Sir Joseph.’ ‘Is this all? Have you nothing else, Porter?’ in- quired Sir Joseph. Toby replied in the negative. ‘You have no bill or demand upon me — my namo is Bowley, Sir Joseph Bowley — of any kind from anybody, have you?’ said Sir Joseph. ‘If you have, present it. There is a cheque-book by the side of Mr. Fish. I allow nothing to be carried into the New Year. Every description of account is settled in this house at the close of the old one. So that if death was to — to –‘ ‘To cut,’ suggested Mr. Fish. ‘To sever, sir,’ returned Sir Joseph, with great asper- ity, ‘the cord of existence — my affairs would be found, I hope, in a state of preparation.’ ‘My dear Sir Joseph!’ said the lady, who was greatly younger than the gentleman. ‘How shocking!’ ‘My lady Bowley,’ returned Sir Joseph, flounder- ing now and then, as in the great depth of his obser- vations, ‘at this season of the year we should think of — of — ourselves. We should look into our — our accounts. We should feel that every return of so eventful a period in human transactions, involves a matter of deep moment between a man and his — and his banker.’ Sir Joseph delivered these words as if he felt the full morality of what he was saying; and desired that even Trotty should have an opportunity of being improved by such discourse. Possibly he had this end before him in still forbearing to break the seal of the letter, and in telling Trotty to wait where he was, a minute. ‘You were desiring Mr. Fish to say, my lady –‘ observed Sir Joseph. ‘Mr. Fish has said that, I believe,’ returned his lady, glancing at the letter. ‘But, upon my word, Sir Joseph, I don’t think I can let it go after all. It is so very dear.’ ‘What is dear!’ inquired Sir Joseph. ‘That Charity, my love. They only allow two votes for a subscription of five pounds. Really monstrous!’ ‘My lady Bowley,’ returned Sir Joseph, ‘you sur- prise me. Is the luxury of feeling in proportion to the number of votes; or is it, to a rightly constituted mind, in proportion to the number of applicants, and the wholesome state of mind to which their canvas- sing reduces them? Is there no excitement of the purest kind in having two votes to dispose of among fifty people?’ ‘Not to me, I acknowledge,’ replied the lady. ‘It bores one. Besides, one can’t oblige one’s acquaint- ance. But you are the Poor Man’s Friend, you know, Sir Joseph. You think otherwise.’ ‘I am the Poor Man’s Friend,’ observed Sir Joseph, glancing at the poor man present. ‘As such I may be taunted. As such I have been taunted. But I ask no other title.’ ‘Bless him for a noble gentleman!’ thought Trotty. ‘I don’t agree with Cute here, for instance,’ said Sir Joseph, holding out the letter. ‘I don’t agree with the Filer party. I don’t agree with any party. My friend the Poor Man, has no business with any- thing of that sort, and nothing of that sort has any business with him. My friend the Poor Man, in my district, is my business. No man or body of men has any right to interfere between my friend and me. That is the ground I take. I assume a — a paternal character towards my friend. I say, “My good fellow, I will treat you paternally.” ‘ Toby listened with great gravity, and began to feel more comfortable. ‘Your only business, my good fellow,’ pursued Sir Joseph, looking abstractedly at Toby; ‘your only business in life is with me. You needn’t trouble yourself to think about anything. I will think for you; I know what is good for you; I am your per- petual parent. Such is the dispensation of an all-wise Providence! Now, the design of your creation is — not that you should swill, and guzzle, and associate your enjoyments, brutally, with food’; Toby thought remorsefully of the tripe; ‘but that you should feel the Dignity of Labour. Go forth erect into the cheer- ful morning air, and — stop there. Live hard and tem- perately, be respectful, exercise your self-denial, bring up your family on next to nothing, pay your rent as regularly as the clock strikes, be punctual in your dealings (I set you a good example; you will find Mr. Fish, my confidential secretary, with a cash-box before him at all times); and you may trust me to be your Friend and Father.’ ‘Nice children, indeed, Sir Joseph!’ said the lady, with a shudder. ‘Rheumatisms, and fevers, and crooked legs, and asthmas, and all kinds of horrors!’ ‘My lady,’ returned Sir Joseph, with solemnity, ‘not the less am I the Poor Man’s Friend and Father. Not the less shall he receive encouragement at my hands. Every quarter-day he will be put in com- munication with Mr. Fish. Every New Year’s Day, myself and friends will drink his health. Once every year, myself and friends will address him with the deepest feeling. Once in his life, he may even per- haps receive; in public, in the presence of the gentry; a Trifle from a Friend. And when, upheld no more by these stimulants, and the Dignity of Labour, he sinks into his comfortable grave, then my lady’ — here Sir Joseph blew his nose — ‘I will be a Friend and a Father — on the same terms — to his children.’ Toby was greatly moved. ‘O! You have a thankful family, Sir Joseph!’ cried his wife ‘My lady,’ said Sir Joseph, quite majestically, ‘In- gratitude is known to be the sin of that class. I expect no other return.’ ‘Ah! Born bad!’ thought Toby. ‘Nothing melts us.’ ‘What man can do, I do,’ pursued Sir Joseph. ‘I do my duty as the Poor Man’s Friend and Father; and I endeavour to educate his mind, by inculcating on all occasions the one great moral lesson which that class requires. That is, entire Dependence on myself. They have no business whatever with — with themselves. If wicked and designing persons tell them otherwise, and they become impatient and dis- contented, and are guilty of insubordinate conduct and black-hearted ingratitude; which is undoubtedly the case; I am their Friend and Father still. It is so Ordained. It is in the nature of things.’ With that great sentiment, he opened the Alder- man’s letter; and read it. ‘Very polite and attentive, I am sure!’ exclaimed Sir Joseph. ‘My lady, the Alderman is so obliging as to remind me that he has had “the distinguished honour” — he is very good — of meeting me at the house of our mutual friend Deedles, the banker; and he does me the favour to inquire whether it will be agreeable to me to have Will Fern put down.’ ‘Most agreeable!’ replied my Lady Bowley. ‘The worst man among them! He has been committing a robbery, I hope?’ ‘Why no,’ said Sir Joseph, referring to the letter. ‘Not quite. Very near. Not quite. He came up to London, it seems, to look for employment (try- ing to better himself — that’s his story), and being found at night asleep in a shed, was taken into cus- tody, and carried next morning before the Alderman. The Alderman observes (very properly) that he is determined to put this sort of thing down; and that if it will be agreeable to me to have Will Fern put down, he will be happy to begin with him.’ ‘Let him be made an example of, by all means, returned the lady. ‘Last winter, when I introduced pinking and eyelet-holing among the men and boys in the village, as a nice evening employment, and had the lines,