“Yea, there is.” Eirik paused before continuing, “You have the demeanor of a stiff-necked nun who never spread her legs for a man’s staff, and yet I have been told you were wanton in your youth. I cannot fathom a woman such as you bearing a man’s weight, let alone a bastard child.”
Eadyth closed her eyes momentarily, ill prepared for the mention of her son John. She had known the boy would have to be discussed if Eirik agreed to the marriage. He was, after all, the reason for her being forced into such a repugnant alliance. But she had hoped to bring up the subject in her own good time.
“Yea, I have a son,” she admitted finally, looking him directly in the eye. “Is John an obstacle to this marriage?”
Eirik traced the edge of his goblet with a long, well-formed forefinger while he studied her further. Eadyth noticed that his smallest finger was missing, cut off long ago at the base, and she wondered idly if he had lost it in battle or an accident. Her speculation was interrupted as he continued speaking slowly, with what seemed to be carefully chosen words.
“If I met a woman I wanted to wed, a child would not deter me from the vows. ‘Twould be false of me to say I would not prefer a virgin to wife, but then who am I to judge? I bear the mark of bastardy myself, and I have two illegitimate daughters of my own.” He grinned sheepishly at her. ” ‘Twould seem we share a common bond.”
Eadyth gritted her teeth and fisted her hands so tight the nails dug painfully into the soft flesh of her palms. She wanted to tell him what she thought of his fathering two illegitimate children. It was not her fault that her son was born outside wedlock. But he, an unwed man, could have given his daughters legitimacy. Oh, how desperately she would like to inform him that the only bond he shared was with all unscrupulous, loose-moraled men who thought their male organs were gifts from God to be pushed indiscriminately into every maid who dared to cross their paths. He disgusted her. She, more than any other, knew how women suffered from mating outside marriage, even when promises were made aplenty.
But she could not voice her thoughts. Not now. She had to get his consent to the marriage. Once they wed, if they did, then he would get an earful of her opinions on his begetting two bastards.
Her voice oozed forced politeness as she asked, “Oh? And where are the children?”
“Larise lives nearby with Earl Orm and his family. She is eight.”
“Will she live with you now you have returned to Northumbria?”
Eirik shrugged uncertainly. “I do not know yet. It depends on whether I decide to stay at Ravenshire.”
How heartless! Eadyth thought. How could he abandon his young daughter to the care of others? The poor child! And what was that about not staying at Ravenshire? Perchance his absence could work to her advantage if they wed. She wanted no bothersome husband around to interfere with her freedom.
“And the other child?”
A brief flash of misery clouded his eyes. “Emma is only six. She lives in an orphanage in Jorvik, has done since she was three. My foster uncle Selik and his wife Rain, my half sister, care for her there.” His voice cracked with emotion.
His words puzzled Eadyth. “But why an orphanage for such a young child, and one not a true orphan, at that?”
Eirik’s expression turned bleak as he answered bluntly, “I have been away from Ravenshire for a long time and have had no home to provide her. Besides, Emma cannot speak, and she gets special care from Rain, who is an accomplished healer.” Then he stiffened and said resolutely, “I do not wish to discuss Emma.”
“And their mother? Could she not care for them?”
“Both mothers are dead.”
Both? Eirik had abandoned not one, but two women to the shame she knew so well. The lusty wretch!
Still, she bit her tongue to stop the spill of ill-advised opinions. She must tread carefully.