‘That’s fair. We have a full-up live-fire rehearsal tomorrow night.’
‘We’ll be there, Dutch,’ Greer promised.
The team was in an old barracks designed for at least sixty men, and there was plenty of room for everyone, enough that no one had a top bunk. Kelly had a private room set aside, one of those designed into the standard barracks for squad sergeants to sleep in. He’d decided not to live on his boat. One could not be part of the team and yet be totally separate from it.
They were enjoying their first night off since arriving at Quantico, and some kind soul had arranged for three cases of beer. That made for exactly three bottles each, since one of their number only drank Dr Pepper, and Master Gunnery Sergeant Irvin made sure that none of their number exceeded the limit.
‘Mr Clark,’ one of the grenadiers asked, ‘what’s this all about?’
It wasn’t fair, Kelly thought, to make them train without letting them know. They prepared for danger without knowing why, without knowing what purpose occasioned the risk of their lives and their future. It wasn’t fair at all, but it wasn’t unusual either. He looked straight in the man’s eyes.
‘I can’t tell you, Corp. All I can say is, it’s something you’ll be mighty proud of. You have my word on that, Marine.’
The corporal, at twenty-one the youngest and most junior man of the group, hadn’t expected an answer, but he’d had to ask. He accepted the reply with a raise-can salute.
‘I know that tattoo,’ a more senior man said.
Kelly smiled, finishing his second. ‘Oh, I got drunk one night, and I guess I got mistook for somebody else.’
‘All SEALs are good for is balancing a ball on their nose,’ a buck Sergeant said, following it with a belch.
‘Want me to demonstrate with one of yours?’ Kelly asked quickly.
‘Good one!’ The sergeant tossed Kelly another beer.
‘Mr Clark?’ Irvin gestured to the door. It was just as sticky-hot out there as inside, with a gentle breeze coming through the long-needled pines and the flapping of bats, invisibly chasing insects.
‘What is it?’ Kelly asked, taking a long pull.
That’s my question, Mr Clark, sir,’ Irvin said lightly. Then his voice changed. ‘I know you.’
‘Oh?’
‘Third Special Operations Group. My team backed you guys up on ERMINE COAT. You’ve come far for an E-6,’ Irvin observed.
‘Don’t spread it around, but I made chief before I left. Does anybody else know?’
Irvin chuckled. ‘No, I expect Captain Albie would sure as hell get his nose outa joint if he found out, and General Young might have a conniption. We’ll just keep it ‘tween us, Mr Clark,’ Irvin said, establishing his position in oblique but uncertain terms.
‘This wasn’t my idea – being here, I mean. Admirals are easy to impress, I suppose.’
‘I’m not, Mr Clark. You almost gave me a fucking heart attack with that rubber knife of yours. I don’t remember your name, your real one, I mean, but you’re the guy they called Snake, aren’t you? You’re the guy did PLASTIC FLOWER.’
‘That wasn’t the smartest thing I ever did,’ Kelly pointed out.
‘We were your backup on that, too. The goddamned chopper died – engine quit ten feet off the ground – thump. That’s why we didn’t make it. Nearest alternate was from First Cav. That’s why it took so long.’
Kelly turned, Irvin’s face was as black as the night. ‘I didn’t know.’
The master gunnery sergeant shrugged in the darkness. ‘I seen the pictures of what happened. The skipper told us that you were a fool to break the rules like that. But that was our fault. We should have been there twenty minutes after your call. If’n we got there on time, maybe one or two of those little girls might have made it. Anyway, reason we didn’t was a bad seal on the engine, just a little goddamn piece of rubber that cracked.’
Kelly grunted. On such events the fates of nations tatted. ‘Could have been worse – it could have let go at altitude and you woulda realty been in the shitter.’
‘True. Miserable fuckin’ reason for a child to die, isn’t it?’ Irvin paused, gazing into the darkness of the piney woods as men of his profession did, always looking and listening. ‘I understand why you did it. I wanted you to know. Probably woulda done the same myself. Maybe not as good as you, but sure as hell, I would have tried, and I wouldn’t have let that motherfucker live, orders or no orders.’
‘Thanks, Guns,’ Kelly said quietly, dropping back into Navyspeak. .
‘It’s Song Tay, isn’t it?’ Irvin observed next, knowing that he’d get his answer now.
‘Something close to that, yes. They should be telling you soon.’
‘You have to tell me more, Mr Clark. I have Marines to worry about.’
‘The site is set up just right, perfect match. Hey, I’m going in, too, remember?’
‘Keep talking,’ Irvin ordered gently.
‘I helped plan the insertion. With the right people, we can do it. Those are good boys you have in there. I won’t say it’s easy or any dumb shit like that, but it’s not all that hard. I’ve done harder. So have you. The training is going right. It looks pretty good to me, really.’
‘You sure it’s worth it?’
That was a question with meaning so deep that few would have understood it. Irvin had done two combat tours, and though Kelly hadn’t seen his official ‘salad bar’ of decorations, he was clearly a man who had circled the block many times. Now Irvin was watching what might well be the destruction of his Marine Corps. Men were dying for hills that were given back as soon as they were taken and the casualties cleared, then to return in six months to repeat the exercise. There was just something in the professional soldier that hated repetition. Although training was just that – they had ‘assaulted’ the site numerous times – the reality of war was supposed to be one battle for one place. In that way a man could tell what progress was. Before looking forward to a new objective, you could look back to see how far you had come and measure your chance for success by what you had learned before. But the third time you watched men die for the same piece of ground, then you knew. You just knew how things were going to end. Their country was still sending men to that place, asking them to risk their lives for dirt already watered in American blood. The truth was that Irvin would not have voluntarily gone back for a third combat tour. It wasn’t a question of courage or dedication or love of country. It was that he knew his life was too valuable to be risked for nothing. Sworn to defend his country, he had a right to ask for something in return – a real mission to fight for, not an abstraction, something real. And yet Irvin felt guilt, felt that he had broken faith, had betrayed the motto of The Corps, Semper Fidelis: Always Faithful. The guilt had compelled him to volunteer for one last mission despite his doubts and questions. Like a man whose beloved wife has slept with another man, Irvin could not stop loving, could not stop caring, and he would accept to himself the guilt unacknowledged by those who had earned it.
‘Guns, I can’t tell you this, but I will anyway. The place we’re hitting, it’s a prison camp, like you think, okay?’
Irvin nodded. ‘More to it. There has to be.’
‘It’s not a regular camp. The men there, they’re all dead, Guns.’ Kelly crushed the beer can. ‘I’ve seen the photos. One guy we identified for sure, Air Force colonel, the NVA said he was killed, and so we think these guys, they’ll never come home unless we go get ’em. I don’t want to go back either, man. I’m scared, okay? Oh, yeah, I’m good, I’m real good at this stuff. Good training, maybe I have a knack for it.’ Kelly shrugged, not wanting to say the next part.
‘Yeah. But you can only do it so long.’ Irvin handed over another beer.
‘I thought three was the limit.’
‘I’m a Methodist, not supposed to drink at all.’ Irvin chuckled. ‘People like us, Mr Clark.’
‘Dumb sunzabitches, aren’t we? There’s Russians in the camp, probably interrogating our people. They’re all high-rank, and we think they’re all officially dead. They’re probably being grilled real hard for what they know, because of who they are. We know they’re there, and if we don’t do anything … what’s that make us?’ Kelly stopped himself, suddenly needing to go further, to tell what else he was doing, because he had found someone who might truly understand, and for all his obsession with avenging Pam his soul was becoming heavy with its burden.