I had thrown away the one defence Herrel might have set between me and what they intended. Though I was not to know that for long to come.
Hyron moved quickly, and he had the backing of all the pack but one in that moving. Illusions they dealt in-but illusions may be common, or very complex. And the opening of the gate allowed them to draw upon sources of energy which had been dammed from their use for a long time.
I roused as Herrel knelt beside me, cup in his hand, concern in his face, his touch tender. He would have me drink-it was the reviving fluid which had restored me before. I could recall its taste, its spicy scent. Herrel-I put out my hand-it was so heavy-so hard to lift. Herrel’s cheek bearing my nail brand-Why had I so misused one who-one who-?
But that cheek wore no brand! Herrel-cat-Or wax it a cat’s green eyes watching me? Cat-bear-? My eyelids were so heavy I could not hold them open.
But though I could not see, yet still it would seem that hearing had not foresaken me, the dregs of my power leaving open that small channel to the outer world. I could hear movement in the tent about me. Then I was lifted, carried-
I was aloof, apart from what my ears reported.
“-fear him-“
“Him?” Laughter. “Look upon him, brothers! Can he move to raise his hand, does he even know what we now would do?”
“Yes, he will be content enough to ride with us in the morning.”
It was like that beat of their desire in the valley, but now it formed a huge, stifling cloud of will-their will-pushing me down into darkness-with no hope of struggling against it.
The Hounds of Death
THE ASHEN forest about me again-and the hunt! But this was, in its way, worse than it had been before. I looked down upon my breast for that amulet which had been my safety in a sea of terror. This time it did not warm my flesh. I was bare of any defence. Yet I did not run. As once I had said, when fear comes too often, then it loses its sharp edge. I braced my back against one of the dead trees and waited.
Wind-no, not wind, but a purpose so great it sent its force before it as a wind-stirred the leaves which were pallid skeletons of their living brothers. Still did I make myself stand and wait.
There were shadows-but not dark-these were pale and grey and they flitted about, their misshapen outlines hinting of monstrous things. But, as I continued to stand my ground, they only gathered behind the trees, menacing, not attacking.
A wail to follow on that wind of purpose, so high and shrill as to hurt the ears. The shadows swayed and fluttered. Now down the forest aisles moved those who had substance. Bear, wolves, birds of prey; boar, and others I could not name. They walked erect which somehow made them more formidable to my eyes than if they hunted four-footedly.
The need for speech struggled in my throat. Let me but call aloud their names! Only that relief was denied me, and it was as if I suffocated in the need to scream.
Behind the beasts the shadows gathered thickly, their outlines melting, re-forming, melting again, so all that I knew was they were things of terror, utterly inimical to my form of life. Now the pack of beasts split apart and gave wide room to the leader of their company. A long horse head, the wildness of an untamed stallion gleaming in the eyes. And in its human-hands a weapon-a bow of grey-white tipped with silver, a cord which gave off a green gleam.
He who wore the bear’s mask held out an arrow. It, too, was green. A spear of light might have been forged into that splinter shaft.
“By the bone of death, the power of silver, the force of our desire-“ No spoken words, the invocation rang in my head as a pain thrust, “Thus do we loose one of three, never to be knotted together again!”
The shaft of light set to the cord of light. Now had I desired in that last moment to seek a small and doomed moment of safety in flight, yet I would not have succeeded, for their united wills held me as fast as if I were bound to the tree. And the cord twanged, or else that small sound was sensed rather than heard.
Cold-a bite of frost so bitter and so deep that it was worse than any pain I had ever known. I stood still against the tree-or did I? For in strange double vision now I looked upon the scene as one who had no part in it. There was she who stood, and another she who lay upon the ground. Then she who stood moved forward to that company of beasts, and they ringed her around and vanished among the trees. But she who lay did not move. And now I was she who lay-and the shadows were drawing in to-
I had said fear could become so familiar it no longer was a goad. But there was that in those shadows which caused such a revulsion and terror in me that I answered with a frantic denial of them, of what I saw-And was answered by dark and no knowledge at all-
Cold-piercing cold-I had never known such cold. But cold was my portion now-cold, cold, cold-
I opened my eyes. Over me a leaden sky and from it the falling of snow. Tent-surely there was a tent-?
Slowly I moved, struggled to sit up. Memory also awoke. Those cliffs I had seen before-this was the valley which led to the gate of the Riders’ lost land. But it was empty. No tents stood, no mounts in a picket line. Snow drifted a little, but it had not quite yet hidden a ring of fire blackened stones. Fire-heat to banish this body aching cold! Fire!
I crept to those stones on hands and knees, thrust my fingers into the ashes. But they were long dead, as cold as the flesh and bone which probed them.
“Herrel-Kildas-Herrel!” I cried those names and had them echoed ghost-fashion back to me. There came no other answer. The camp, all those who had been within it-gone-utterly gone!
That this was another dream I never believed. This was the truth, and one my mind flinched from accepting. It seemed that the Riders had indeed rid themselves of one they did not want, and by the simplest of methods-leaving me behind in the wilderness.
I had two feet-I could walk-I could follow-
Swaying I got to those feet, staggering along. Only to return again to hands and knees, to crawling. And then-there it was-that unbroken cliff wall. Had there ever been a gate? After all I had not seen it. If there had it was firmly closed once more.
Cold-it was so cold-I would lie in the snow and sleep again and from that sleep there would come no waking. But sleep-sleep perhaps meant an ashen forest and the shadow that crept in to-feed! Painfully I made my way back down over the rubble. There, already powdered with snow was the furred rug on which I had lain. I shuffled to it, to find something else-my bag of simples.
My hands were so cold I could hardly feel anything my fingers handled, but somehow I brought out one of the vials, got it to my lips, sipped, waited for inner warmth to follow.
No warmth-cold-cold-As if some part of me had been frozen for all time, or else drawn out to leave an empty void into which ice had moulded. But my head cleared, my hands answered the commands of my brain with more skill.
I had the rug on which I had lain, and my bag, the travel stained clothing I wore. There was naught else-no weapon, no food. I might have been left for dead on some battlefield where the victor cared not to honour the remains of the vanquished.
Cold-so cold-
Wood, some wood left. And they had not been wise to discard my simple bag-ho, that had been a grievous mistake on their part. I was better learned in the worth of what I carried so far than they might guess.
I dragged the wood to the fire stones, laid it as best I could, and then smeared on some twigs a fingers tip of salve, to which I added drops from another vial. My hands were steady. They moved easily now. Flame answered, caught easily at the branches around. I drew as close as I might to its warmth.
Warm-on my hands, my face, my body, yes, there was warmth. But inside me, cold, cold, cold emptiness! At last I found the right word for that sense of loss. I was empty-or had been emptied! Of what? Not life, for I moved, breathed, knew not hunger and thirst, which I assuaged with handfuls of snow. The cordial from my bag had quieted the pangs of physical hunger. Still I was empty-and never would I be whole again until I was filled.