License Invoked by Robert Asprin & Jody Lynn Nye

“SATN-TV, please hold,” the operator said, poking the flashing button with the end of a pencil. “SATN-TV, please hold. SATN-TV, yes, Mr. Mooney! He’s expecting your call. I’ll put you right through, sir.” She jabbed the HOLD button, and cleared her throat. “Mr. Kingston, Mr. Mooney on line three.”

* * *

Kingston sat down in a huge, black, leather swivel chair in his office and swung it away from the monitors trained on Studio One. “Eldredge, nice to hear from you.”

“Is this going to happen, Augustus?” Eldredge Mooney asked. His voice was a low growl, like a bear awakened prematurely from hibernation. “People are beginning to ask me questions. They want to see results!”

Kingston kicked back and put one polished black shoe on his solid, non-sustainably harvested mahogany desk. “Yes, Eldredge, it’s going right on schedule. We all ought to be getting one powerful charge in the batteries tomorrow night. I can’t wait for the rest of the Council to see the setup. I’m looking forward to having you all here.”

“This is the first major test of the system, you know.”

“Of course I know it! It’s an honor to be the one to push the button, so to speak, and I am sure it’s going to be a big success. I was just watching some of our faithful who are providing the charge that primes the pump, so to speak. This technology’s just plain brilliant. The machines have been ticking over just fine on the reactions we’re getting to the nut fringe. The indicators say we’re already showing about eight percent feed, and that’s without any input from out of town. Technology’s wonderful, Eldredge. I don’t know why we didn’t have access to something like this before. And what with the Internet channels coming in line, we’ll be able to blow anything we feel like right out of the water, so to speak. And, since naturally that’s what we have in mind here, it’s going to work like a charm.”

“It only works if you have direct access to the subject,” Mooney objected.

Irritated, Kingston puffed on his cigar, surrounding himself with a fiendish aureole of smoke. It was clear that they were underestimating SATN and the planning skills of its chief of administration.

He had little direct contact with Mooney and the rest of the influential circle he represented. He’d met them on-line, in a private chat room on a black-magic website. Kingston had been amazed to discover that so many like-minded individuals turned out to live in his neck of the woods, although Mooney was the only one he had met in person so far. The others were holding back, waiting until he proved himself worthy of being one of them. Membership in the Elder Council of Deepest Evil, as they called it, was held out to him as a carrot—although a heavy stick was poised to fall on his back if he blew the chance they were giving him.

Kingston was doing his best to make sure he wouldn’t. He wanted to be a part of their number in the worst way. His fondest daydreams, even as a child, involved world domination. As a grownup, he’d be content just to increase his dominion to absolute power over those under his control, and that was what the Council promised. These men were the real deal. The satanists, cursers, death-talkers, all the wrongdoers who made CNN were pigeons compared with his long-distance comrades. These evil worshipers had discovered the power of high tech. The one inescapable problem was power. They needed it. The easy way to raise it was from a strong emotional surge from as many people as possible all at once. Fionna Kenmare put on a mighty powerful show. He’d seen one himself. If at a climactic moment something happened to her, the power released would be tremendous. That was what Mooney and his friends wanted, and he was poised to give it to them.

“We’ve got direct access, Eldredge, I told you. We’ve got the perfect conduit to Fionna Kenmare. Our person on the scene guarantees that the link has been made. Has been for some time. We’ve been running little tests, and I’ve got to tell you, they’ve all worked.”

“Wonderful,” Mooney gloated. “We can claim that she’s being attacked because she espouses magic, never knowing that those attacks were just trial runs, and have nothing to do with her own wretchedly limited beliefs. Can the conduit be associated with you in any way?”

“Our focus person picked the perfect accomplice, Eldredge. No one will ever be able to trace it back to us . . . or you. It’s all so perfectly hands-off.”

“This will mean big things for all of us, Augustus, especially you.”

Kingston sat back and put his other foot up on the desk, and blew a long stream of smoke at the ceiling. He liked being appreciated. “That’s the general idea, Eldredge.”

“Well, I want an update later,” Mooney said, trying not to sound as though he doubted Kingston’s word. Kingston knew the Council didn’t want him to walk away at this point. Not with so much at stake.

“You’ll get it,” Kingston said. “And, oh, Eldredge, keep CNN turned on tomorrow night. They’ve always got the most current coverage of late-breaking events. Nice hearing from you. Say hello to the missus for me.”

Chapter 11

That evening Elizabeth circulated through the room, smiling and nodding to Beauray’s arriving “specialists,” all the time aware that she was experiencing another facet of the surprisingly complex world that existed within the bounds of the French Quarter. While she had seen examples of “gracious Southern living styles” in various old movies, and had experienced a minor taste of it in her own room, she nonetheless found it impressive.

For one thing, the surroundings were far more sumptuous than at any meeting she had ever attended outside of a great house or palace in the United Kingdom. Beauray had somehow gotten the use of a suite at the Royal Sonesta. (When she asked about how he could arrange it so quickly, Boo-Boo had simply shrugged and given what she was now beginning to recognize as his trademark answer: “I know someone on the staff.”) It reminded her of the nicer kind of private London clubs, but decorated in lighter colors. The main area was roughly the size of a volleyball court, and luxuriously furnished with overstuffed sofas and chairs as well as small cocktail tables draped with white brocade cloths. Heavy drapes framed the large windows which looked out onto the hotel’s massive inner courtyard, and soft light was provided by several bright crystal chandeliers. An ebony baby grand piano stood underneath the window at the room’s far end.

The others in attendance seemed to take it all in stride, giving the room and its furnishings little notice and even less comment, choosing instead to focus on the well-stocked bar situated beneath a painting the size of a bed. She was pleased to see the bar herself. Comments from other friends who had come to American dos in the past had complained that Yankees threw big parties, but neglected to provide alcoholic refreshment in favor of soft drinks, as if all their guests were still underage. Fionna/Phoebe’s eyes would probably have gleamed at the sight of the warm, mahogany counter lined with bottles of every size and shape, but she was locked up, shivering, in her suite with Lloyd. Elizabeth was sorry she was so frightened, but it kept her behaving. The issue was not only what outside forces would inflict upon her, but what Fionna could do to herself, given a free hand. For once she would have to settle for room service, and like it.

As they waited for the last few stragglers to arrive, Elizabeth could not help but study those already present with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.

In her own home offices of OOPSI they held occasional staff meetings, and sometimes brought in outside consultants. There, however, the consultants were invariably either dusty academics or blustery bureaucrats. The main challenge was staying awake through the drawn-out lectures and discussions of procedures. This gathering, appropriately enough for New Orleans, had more the appearance of a costume party.

Elizabeth accepted a sweet-smelling drink the uniformed bartender identified as a “Sazerac,” and surveyed Boo’s gathering allies.

“A few of my friends,” Beauray had said. Elizabeth tried to imagine what life would be like with friends like these. If she went back through her entire life of memories and catalogued every strange character she had ever met or come into contact with, the list would not be half as large or varied as the group assembling in the room.

There were a large number of Blacks, both men and women, present, standing singly or sitting in small groups of two or three. One group was garbed in bright purple robes, while others were dressed in white and wore head scarves folded in elaborate patterns. From the night before she recalled the slight gentleman in blue jeans and a leather vest who carried an intricately carved wooden walking staff and wore a straw cowboy hat, ornately decorated with long feathers.

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