‘I do not expect to be more than an hour or so, Mr Dillon,’ said Jack, with an odd mixture of conscious stiffness and hidden excitement; and as the bosun sprung his call he stepped down into the scrubbed and gleaming cutter. Bonden had judged better than James Dillon: the cutter’s crew might have been all the colours of the rainbow, or even pied, for all Captain Aubrey cared at this moment.
The sun set in a somewhat troubled sky; the bells of Ciudadela rang for the Angelus and the Sophie’s for the last dog watch; the moon. rose, very near the full, swimming up gloriously behind Black Point. Hammocks were piped down. The watch changed. Seized by Lucock’s passion for navigation, all the midshipmen took observations of the moon as it mounted, and of the fixed stars, one by one. Eight bells, and the middle watch. The lights of Ciudadela all going out.
‘Cutter’s away, sir,’ reported the sentry at last, and ten minutes later Jack came up the side. He was very pale, and in the strong moonlight he looked deathly – black hole for a mouth, hollows for his eyes. ‘Are you still on deck, Mr Dillon?’ he said, with an attempt at a smile. ‘Make sail, if you please: the tail of the sea-breeze will carry us out,’ he said, and walked uncertainly into his cabin.
CHAPTER TEN
‘Maimomdes has an account of a lute-player who, required to perform upon some stated occasion, found that he had
entirely forgot not only the piece but the whole art of playing, fingering, everything,’ wrote Stephen ‘I have some times had a dread of the same thing happening to me; a not irrational dread, since I once experienced a deprivation of a similar nature coming back to Aghamore when I was
a boy, coming back after an eight years’ absence, I went to
see Bridie Coolan, and she spoke to me in Irish Her voice was intimately familiar (none more, my own wet-nurse), so
were the intonations and even the very words, yet nothing
could I understand – her words conveyed no meaning whatever. I was dumbfounded at my loss. What puts me in mind of this is my discovery that I no longer know what my friends feel, intend, or even mean. It is clear that JA met with a severe disappointment in Ciudadela,
one that he feels more deeply than I should have supposed possible, in him; and it is clear that JD is still in a state of great unhappiness: but beyond that I know almost nothing
– they do not speak and I can no longer look into them. My own testiness does not help, to be sure. I must guard against a strong and increasing tendency to indulge in dogged, sullen conduct – the conduct of vexation (much promoted by want of exercise); but I confess that much as I love them, I could wish them both to the Devil, with their high-flown, egocentrical points of honour and their purblind spurring one another on to remarkable exploits that may very well end in unnecessary death. In their death, which is their concern: but also in mine, to say nothing of the rest of the ship’s company. A slaughtered crew, a sunken ship, and my collections destroyed – these do not weigh at all against their punctilios. There is a systematic fiocci-naucinihili-pilification of all other aspects of existence that angers me. I spend half my time purging them, bleeding them, prescribing low diet and soporifics. They both eat far too much, and drink far too much,
especially JD. Sometimes I am afraid they have closed themselves to me because they have agreed upon a meeting next time we come ashore, and they know very well I should stop it. How they vex my very spirit! If they had the scrubbing of the decks, the hoisting of the sails, the cleaning of the heads, we should hear little enough of these fine vapourings.
I have no patience with them. They are strangely immature for men of their age and their position: though, indeed, it is to be supposed that if they were not, they would not be here
– the mature, the ponderate mind does not embark itself upon a man-of-war -is not to be found wandering about the face of the ocean in quest of violence. For all his sensibility (and he played his transcription of Deh vieni with a truly exquisite delicacy, just before we reached Ciudadela), JA is in many ways more suited to be a pirate chief in the Caribbean a hundred years ago: and for all his acumen JD is in danger of becoming an enthusiast – a latter-day Loyola, if he is not knocked on the head first, or run through the body. I am much exercised in my mind by that unfortunate conversation.. .’
The Sophie, to the astonishment of her people, had not headed for Barcelona after leaving Ciudadela, but west-north-west; and at daybreak, rounding Cape Salou within hail of the shore, she had picked up a richly-laden Spanish coaster of some two hundred tons, mounting (but not firing) six six-pounders – had picked her up from the landward side as neatly as though the rendezvous had been fixed weeks ahead and the Spanish captain had kept his hour to the minute. ‘A very profitable commercial venture,’ said James, watching the prize disappear in the east, bound with a favourable wind for Port Mahon, while they beat up, tack upon tack, to their northern cruising-ground, one of the busiest sea-lanes in the world. But that (though unhappy in itself) was not the conversation Stephen had in mind.
No. That came later, after dinner, when he was on the quarterdeck with James. They were talking, in an easy, off-hand manner, about differences in national habit
– the Spaniards’ late hours; the French way of all leaving the table together, men and women, and going directly into the drawing-room; the Irish habit of staying with the wine until one of the guests suggested moving; the English way
of leaving this to the host; the remarkable difference in duelling habits.
‘Rencounters are most uncommon in England,’ observed James.
‘Indeed they are,’ said Stephen. ‘I was astonished, when
first I went to London, to find that a man might not go out from one year’s end to the other.’
‘Yes,’ said James. ‘Ideas upon matters of honour are altogether different in the two kingdoms. Before now I
have given Englishmen provocation that would necessarily have called for a meeting in Ireland, with no result. We should call that remarkably timid; or is shy the word?’ He shrugged, and he was about to continue when the cabin skylight in the surface of the quarter-deck opened and Jack’s head and massive shoulders appeared. ‘I should never have thought so ingenuous a face could look so black and wicked,’ thought Stephen.
‘Did JD say that on purpose?’ he wrote. ‘I do not know for sure, though I suspect he did – it would be all of a piece with the remarks he has been making recently, remarks that may be unintentional, merely tactless, but that all tend to present reasonable caution in an odious and, indeed, a contemptible light. I do not know. I should have known once. But all I know now is that when JA is in a rage with his superiors, irked by the subordination of the service, spurred on by his restless, uneasy temperament, or (as at present) lacerated by his mistress’ infidelity, he flies to violence as a relief –
to action. JD, urged on by entirely different furies, does the same. The difference is that whereas I believe JA merely longs for the shattering noise, immense activity of mind and body, and the all-embracing sense of the present moment, I am very much afraid that J D
wants more.’ He closed the book and stared at its cover for a long while, far, far away, until a knock recalled him to the Sophie.
‘Mr Ricketts,’ he said, ‘what may I do for you?’
‘Sir,’ said the midshipman, ‘the captain says, will you please to come on deck and view the coast?’
‘To the left of the smoke, southwards, that is the hill of Montjuich, with the great castle; and the projection to the right is Barceloneta,’ said Stephen. ‘And rising there behind the city you can make out Tibidabo: I saw my first red-footed falcon there, when I was a boy.
Then continuing the line from Tibidabo through the cathedral to the sea, there is the Moll de Santa Creu, with the great mercantile port: and to the left of it the basin where the King’s ships and the gunboats lie.’
‘Many gunboats?’ asked Jack.
‘I dare say: but I never made it my study.’
Jack nodded, looked keenly round the bay to fix its details in his mind once more and, leaning down, he called, ‘Deck? Lower away: handsomely now. Babbington, look alive with that line.’