My Man Jeeves by Wodehouse, P G

“Of course he had a hat.”

“Fool! I mean mine. Was he carrying a hat?”

“By Jove, he was carrying a parcel. George, old scout, you must get a move on. You must light out if you want to spend the rest of your life out of prison. Slugging a Serene Highness is lese-majeste. It’s worse than hitting a policeman. You haven’t got a moment to waste.”

“But I haven’t any money. Reggie, old man, lend me a tenner or something. I must get over the frontier into Italy at once. I’ll wire my uncle to meet me in——”

“Look out,” I cried; “there’s someone coming!”

He dived out of sight just as Voules came up the companion-way, carrying a letter on a tray.

“What’s the matter!” I said. “What do you want?”

“I beg your pardon, sir. I thought I heard Mr. Lattaker’s voice. A letter has arrived for him.”

“He isn’t here.”

“No, sir. Shall I remove the letter?”

“No; give it to me. I’ll give it to him when he comes.”

“Very good, sir.”

“Oh, Voules! Are they all still at breakfast? The gentleman who came to see Mr. Lattaker? Still hard at it?”

“He is at present occupied with a kippered herring, sir.”

“Ah! That’s all, Voules.”

“Thank you, sir.”

He retired. I called to George, and he came out.

“Who was it?”

“Only Voules. He brought a letter for you. They’re all at breakfast still. The sleuth’s eating kippers.”

“That’ll hold him for a bit. Full of bones.” He began to read his letter. He gave a kind of grunt of surprise at the first paragraph.

“Well, I’m hanged!” he said, as he finished.

“Reggie, this is a queer thing.”

“What’s that?”

He handed me the letter, and directly I started in on it I saw why he had grunted. This is how it ran:

“My dear George—I shall be seeing you to-morrow, I hope; but I

think it is better, before we meet, to prepare you for a curious

situation that has arisen in connection with the legacy which

your father inherited from your Aunt Emily, and which you are

expecting me, as trustee, to hand over to you, now that you have

reached your twenty-fifth birthday. You have doubtless heard

your father speak of your twin-brother Alfred, who was lost or

kidnapped—which, was never ascertained—when you were both

babies. When no news was received of him for so many years, it

was supposed that he was dead. Yesterday, however, I received a

letter purporting that he had been living all this time in Buenos

Ayres as the adopted son of a wealthy South American, and has

only recently discovered his identity. He states that he is on

his way to meet me, and will arrive any day now. Of course, like

other claimants, he may prove to be an impostor, but meanwhile

his intervention will, I fear, cause a certain delay before I can

hand over your money to you. It will be necessary to go into a

thorough examination of credentials, etc., and this will take

some time. But I will go fully into the matter with you when we

meet.—Your affectionate uncle,

“AUGUSTUS ARBUTT.”

I read it through twice, and the second time I had one of those ideas I do sometimes get, though admittedly a chump of the premier class. I have seldom had such a thoroughly corking brain-wave.

“Why, old top,” I said, “this lets you out.”

“Lets me out of half the darned money, if that’s what you mean. If this chap’s not an imposter—and there’s no earthly reason to suppose he is, though I’ve never heard my father say a word about him—we shall have to split the money. Aunt Emily’s will left the money to my father, or, failing him, his ‘offspring.’ I thought that meant me, but apparently there are a crowd of us. I call it rotten work, springing unexpected offspring on a fellow at the eleventh hour like this.”

“Why, you chump,” I said, “it’s going to save you. This lets you out of your spectacular dash across the frontier. All you’ve got to do is to stay here and be your brother Alfred. It came to me in a flash.”

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69

Leave a Reply 0

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *