Swords Against Wizardry – Book 4 of the “Fafhrd and Gray Mouser” series by Fritz Leiber

Fafhrd nodded agreement but continued to gaze over the Mouser’s shoulder.

The Mouser started to reach toward his box, but instead with a small self-contemptuous chuckle picked up the jug and began to pour himself another drink in a careful small stream.

Fafhrd shrugged at last, used the back of his forefingers to push over his own pewter cup for a refill, and yawned mightily, leaning back a little and at the same time pushing his spread-fingered hands to either side across the table, as if pushing away from him all small doubts and wonderings.

The fingers of his left hand touched the Mouser’s box.

His face went blank. He looked down his arm at the box.

Then to the great puzzlement of the Mouser, who had just begun to fill Fafhrd’s cup, the Northerner leaned forward and placed his head ear-down on the box.

“Mouser,” he said in a small voice, “your box is buzzing.”

Fafhrd’s cup was full, but the Mouser kept on pouring.

Heavily fragrant wine puddled and began to run toward the glowing brazier.

“When I touched the box, I felt vibration,” Fafhrd went on bemusedly. “It’s buzzing. It’s still buzzing.”

With a low snarl, the Mouser slammed down the jug and snatched the box from under Fafhrd’s ear. The wine reached the brazier’s hot bottom and hissed. He tore the box open, opened also its mesh top, and he and Fafhrd peered in.

The candlelight dimmed, but by no means extinguished the yellow, violet, reddish, and white twinkling glows rising from various points on the black velvet bottom.

But the candlelight was quite bright enough also to show, at each such point, matching the colors listed, a firebeetle, glowwasp, nightbee, or diamondfly, each insect alive but delicately affixed to the floor of the box with fine silver wire. From time to time the wings or wingcases of some buzzed.

Without hesitation, Fafhrd unclasped the browned-iron bracelet from his wrist, unchained the pouch, and dumped it on the table.

Jewels of various sizes, all beautifully cut, made a fair heap.

But they were all dead black.

Fafhrd picked up a big one, tried it with his fingernail, then whipped out his hunting knife and with its edge easily scored the gem.

He carefully dropped it in the brazier’s glowing center. After a bit it flamed up yellow and blue.

“Coal,” Fafhrd said.

The Mouser clawed his hands over his faintly twinkling box, as if about to pick it up and hurl it through the wall and across the Inner Sea.

Instead he unclawed his hands and hung them decorously at his sides.

“I am going away,” he announced quietly, but very clearly, and did so.

Fafhrd did not look up. He was dropping a second black gem in the brazier.

He did take off the bracelet Nemia had given him; he brought it close to his eyes, said, “Brass … glass,” and spread his fingers to let it drop in the spilled wine. After the Mouser was gone, Fafhrd drained his brimming cup, drained the Mouser’s and filled it again, then went on supping from it as he continued to drop the black jewels one by one in the brazier.

* * * *

Nemia and the Eyes of Ogo sat cozily side by side on a luxurious divan. They had put on negligees. A few candles made a yellowish dusk.

On a low, gleaming table were set delicate flagons of wines and liqueurs, slim-stemmed crystal goblets, golden plates of sweetmeats and savories, and in the center two equal heaps of rainbow-glowing gems.

“What a quaint bore barbarians are,” Nemia remarked, delicately stifling a yawn, “though good for one’s sensuous self, once in a great while. This one had a little more brains than most. I think he might have caught on, except that I made the two clicks come so exactly together when I snapped back on his wrist the bracelet with the false pouch and at the same time my brass keepsake. It’s amazing how barbarians are hypnotized by brass along with any odd bits of glass colored like rubies and sapphires—I think the three primary colors paralyze their primitive brains.”

“Clever, clever Nemia,” the Eyes of Ogo cooed with a tender caress. “My little fellow almost caught on too when I made the switch, but then he got interested in threatening me with his knife. Actually jabbed me between the breasts. I think he has a dirty mind.”

“Let me kiss the blood away, darling Eyes,” Nemia suggested. “Oh, dreadful … dreadful.”

While shivering under her treatment—Nemia had a slightly bristly tongue—Eyes said, “For some reason he was quite nervous about Ogo.” She made her face blank, her pouty mouth hanging slightly open.

The richly draped wall opposite her made a scuttling sound and then croaked in a dry, thick voice, “Open your box, Gray Mouser. Now close it. Girls, girls! Cease your lascivious play!”

Nemia and Eyes clung to each other laughing. Eyes said in her natural voice, if she had one, “And he went away still thinking there was a real Ogo. I’m quite certain of that. My, they both must be in a froth by now.”

Sitting back, Nemia said, “I suppose we’ll have to take some special precautions against their raiding us to get their jewels back.”

Eyes shrugged. “I have my five Mingol swordsmen.”

Nemia said. “And I have my three and a half Kleshite stranglers.”

“Half?” Eyes asked.

“I was counting Ixy. No, but seriously.”

Eyes frowned for half a heartbeat, then shook her head decisively. “I don’t think we need worry about Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser raiding us back. Because we’re girls, their pride will be hurt, and they’ll sulk a while and then run away to the ends of the earth on one of those adventures of theirs.”

“Adventures!” said Nemia, as one who says, “Cesspools and privies!”

“You see, they’re really weaklings,” Eyes went on, warming to her topic. “They have no drive whatever, no ambition, no true passion for money. For instance, if they did—and if they didn’t spend so much time in dismal spots away from Lankhmar—they’d have known that the King of Ilthmar has developed a mania for gems that are invisible by day, but glow by night, and has offered half his kingdom for a sack of star-jewels. And then they’d never have had even to consider such an idiotic thing as coming to us.”

“What do you suppose he’ll do with them? The King, I mean.”

Eyes shrugged. “I don’t know. Build a planetarium. Or eat them.” She thought a moment. “All things considered, it might be as well if we got away from here for a few weeks. We deserve a vacation.”

Nemia nodded, closing her eyes. “It should be absolutely the opposite sort of place to the one in which the Mouser and Fafhrd will have their next—ugh!—adventure.”

Eyes nodded too and said dreamily, “Blue skies and rippling water, spotless beach, a tepid wind, flowers and slim slavegirls everywhere…”

Nemia said, “I’ve always wished for a place that has no weather, only perfection. Do you know which half of Ilthmar’s kingdom has the least weather?”

“Precious Nemia,” Eyes murmured, “you’re so civilized. And so very, very clever. Next to one other, you’re certainly the best thief in Lankhmar.”

“Who’s the other?” Nemia was eager to know.

“Myself, of course,” Eyes answered modestly.

Nemia reached up and tweaked her companion’s ear—not too painfully, but enough.

“If there were the least money depending on that,” she said quietly but firmly, “I’d teach you differently. But since it’s only conversation…”

“Dearest Nemia.”

“Sweetest Eyes.”

The two girls gently embraced and kissed each other fondly.

* * * *

The Mouser glared thin-lipped across a table in a curtained booth in the Golden Lamprey, a tavern not unlike the Silver Eel.

He rapped the teak before him with his fingertip, and the perfumed stale air with his voice, saying, “Double those twenty gold pieces and I’ll make the trip and hear Prince Gwaay’s proposal.”

The very pale man opposite him, who squinted as if even the candlelight were a glare, answered softly, “Twenty-five—and you serve him for one day after arrival.”

“What sort of ass do you take me for?” the Mouser demanded dangerously. “I might be able to settle all his troubles in one day—I usually can—and what then? No, no preagreed service; I hear his proposal only. And … thirty-five gold pieces in advance.”

“Very well, thirty gold pieces—twenty to be refunded if you refuse to serve my master, which would be a risky step, I warn you.”

“Risk is my bedmate,” the Mouser snapped. “Ten only to be refunded.”

The other nodded and began slowly to count rilks onto the teak. “Ten now,” he said. “Ten when you join our caravan tomorrow morning at the Grain Gate. And ten when we reach Quarmall.”

“When we first glimpse the spires of Quarmall,” the Mouser insisted.

The other nodded.

The Mouser moodily snatched the golden coins and stood up. They felt very few in his fist. For a moment he thought of returning to Fafhrd and with him devising plans against Ogo and Nemia.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43

Leave a Reply 0

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *