Pandora’s Legions by Christopher Anvil

Furry creatures, like some kind of blend of Earthmen and the furry animals they called lions.

Towers suddenly grinned.

“I don’t know how it would work. We’ve got some ideas we’d like to try out, but if I’m given orders what to do, and then when I start to do it some blockhead starts telling me I can’t do it that way, or if I get orders to stick to my headquarters so I can fill out all the forms and be there when the phone rings, why, we’re going to have trouble, and we might as well find it out right now. Give me a job—I’m not worried about how hard it is—but then leave me alone. Let me know what the problem is at the beginning. If I’m given to understand that the problem is such-and-such, and then, every time I try to move, some new condition is added, it isn’t going to work. And there’s something else. We might as well have this out in the open, too. I figure there’s no special break in the chain of command between top sergeant and second lieutenant. I don’t see any unbridgeable gap there. If that’s the wrong attitude, get somebody else for the job, because that’s the attitude I’m going to have, whether I’m a buck private in the rear rank or the man in charge. What counts isn’t rank, so far as I can see, but whether the man can and does do the work.”

Towers looked at them, started to say more, then changed his mind, and waited attentively.

The clear impression came to Horsip that whether or not Towers was on trial before the Supreme Staff, the Supreme Staff was, in effect, on trial before Towers. Horsip, though agreeing with what Towers said, began to see why Towers was unpopular with his superiors.

Near Horsip, the slender general named Takkit said, “You know, Towers, there are many unpleasant jobs in the Integral Union. An officer who failed to show a cooperative frame of mind could find himself with a succession of rather unpleasant assignments, with no advancement, and with—shall we say—a somewhat tedious life ahead of him. But life can be quite pleasant for those who are cooperative.”

There was a sudden tense silence, with every eye on Towers.

Towers’ eyes glinted, and then he smiled and faced Takkit.

“Oh, I will cooperate, General.”

Takkit said coolly, “I rather thought you would.”

Towers added, “I just won’t cooperate with a blockhead, General.”

To Argit’s left, the bull-necked general named Maklin suddenly grinned.

Takkit said coldly, “I trust—what is your actual rank?—Major, isn’t it?—I trust, Major—line your hands up along the seams of your trousers, there—I trust that you understand the penalties for even the hint of discourtesy to superiors?”

Again there was silence, with every eye watching Towers, who clicked his heels, stood at stiff attention, and said, “Yes, sir.”

Takkit said lazily, “Oh? Is that so? I’m surprised. I thought you had been in the lop-tail—pardon me, Earth—armed forces. How would you know what our regulations are?”

“Because, sir,” said Towers, “when offered this opportunity to transfer to your armed forces, I naturally studied your regulations first.”

“Is that so?” said Takkit, sounding somewhat foolish.

“Yes, sir,” said Towers, without intonation.

At the far end of the table, the white-furred General Roffis looked at Takkit’s expression and began to grin.

Towers remained at stiff attention.

Takkit said, “At any rate, Major, whatever order I directly give you, you will at once, and without hesitation or question, obey that order, won’t you?”

“I will not, sir,” said Towers matter-of-factly.

“WHY NOT?” roared Takkit.

“Because, sir,” said Towers politely, “I am not yet a member of the Centran Armed Forces, and your authority over me is nonexistent.”

At the far end of the table, General Roffis was beaming.

General Maklin, grinning, banged his fist on the table.

Takkit opened his mouth and shut it again.

Towers remained at stiff attention, waiting.

The silence stretched out, and Argit, with the urgent distracted look of someone groping for a way to cover up someone else’s peculiarly stupid blunder, said, “Were there any more questions that you wanted to ask General Towers, General Takkit?”

Takkit let his breath out with a hiss.

“That will be all for now.”

Towers turned to face Argit, and relaxed from his posture of stiff attention. He now looked alert and attentive, but at ease.

Argit said uneasily, “I think we understand, and are sympathetic with your ideas of command, General Towers . . .”

Horsip, watching, did not know how the Earthman’s face could express, with scarcely a movement of the muscles, such a profound lack of agreement.

Argit studied Towers’ face, cast an irritated glance at the fuming Takkit, and then suddenly glanced around at the other generals, a large number of whom were watching the scene with expressions of profound gratification. Argit seemed to come suddenly to a decision.

“General Towers, if you want the job, and are agreeable, we will, first, support your complete force, allow initially for recruitment to three times its current level, and give you a completely free hand in its organization.”

“That part is more than satisfactory, sir,” said Towers, plainly reserving judgment.

“Now,” said Argit, “some of our men—even occasionally general officers—are not always receptive until they get their minds on the track. Even highly able officers occasionally make errors . . . We all do it . . . And there are always clashes of personality amongst able men. You will need plenty of authority to get the proper cooperation. We cannot give you high rank in the beginning, until your method proves itself clearly. What I propose, to bridge the gap, is a device we have used occasionally in the past. This is the ‘code name,’ and its associated rank. If my colleagues agree, your regular rank with us will be that corresponding to the Earth rank of colonel. This rank is solid, not temporary, but it is insufficient to deal with a hard-headed general in a tight spot. We therefore offer, if the majority of my colleagues agree, a code name—say, ‘Able Hunter’—together with the rank of general, grade III, and—again if the majority of my colleagues agree—a regional seat for Able Hunter on the Supreme Staff. You see, General Towers, we cannot give you this rank, but we can give it to the code name, and then, at our will, assign the code name to you. You can then use the code name whenever you find it advisable. As code names receive no pay, you will suffer a disadvantage in pay for every day you assert this rank. However, once your method proves its worth, there should be little difficulty.”

Argit looked around. “What do you say, shall we give General Towers the rank and code name, with the particulars I’ve just mentioned? Secretary, note the votes.”

A rumble of Yes’s followed, and Argit turned to Towers, who cheerfully accepted the offer.

Horsip, smiling, considered the situation. The Integral Union was so big that there were always upheavals of some kind going on somewhere.

If Towers, code name “Hunter,” needed a place to try out his special methods, the Integral Union could certainly use someone who could straighten out problems.

The question was: Could Towers do it?

As Horsip asked himself that, there came a rap at the door, and the guards let in an officer who bent by Argit’s chair with an air of gloom.

Horsip braced himself.

Argit looked up.

“Another revolt on Centralis II. This time, they’ve managed a total surprise.”

There was a groan, then Argit, and everyone else, turned to the Earthman.

“Towers,” said Argit, “if you want to test your methods, here’s your chance. Get your troops together. We are sending you to Centralis II as fast as we can get you there.”

Part III: Pandora’s Envoy

Tark Monnik, Planetary Integrator of Centralis II, looked out through his twin telescopes at an early-morning panorama of tracer bullets, blazing cannon, and geysers of flying dirt. The solid mountain trembled under his feet. The air reeked of gun powder. Monnik and his occupation army, settled down comfortably just a few weeks before, now found themselves bled white, cornered, and fighting for their lives. Monnik looked up angrily and gestured to a nearby officer with the staff’s morning summary of the situation.

“Sir,” said the officer, “in the north, the enemy—”

“Never mind that,” said Monnik. “The other day I sent out a call for reinforcements. Everything depends on whether or not we get them. Has any answer come in yet?”

The staff officer looked unhappy. “Yes, sir. We’ve had a reply from Drasmon Argit himself.”

“Good,” said Monnik. “Let’s hear it.”

The staff officer separated one sheet of paper from the rest, and read: ” ‘Monnik—Owing to complications elsewhere, we find it impossible to properly reinforce you in less than sixty to eighty days. To tide you over till the reinforcements arrive, we send you “Able Hunter”—this is his code name—who is a member of the Supreme Staff, and a genuine Earthman. Hunter is bringing his Special Effects Team, with full field equipment. You may find Hunter’s methods of war somewhat unconventional and even eccentric, but we would advise you not to underrate either him or them. As we mentioned before, he is an Earthman. Good luck, Argit.’ “

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