Sue Grafton – “N” is for Noose

“For example,” I said.

“You saw the new carpet in the living room?”

“Yes, I saw that.”

Cecilia shot me a glance filled with satisfaction. “She had that installed about ten days ago. I thought it was in poor taste, doing it so soon, but Selma never asked me. Selma’s also confided she’s considering having those two front teeth capped, which is not only vain, but completely trivial. Talk about a waste of money. I guess now she’s a widder, she can do anything she likes.”

What I thought was, what’s wrong with vanity? Given the range of human failings, self-absorption is harmless compared to some I could name. Why not do whatever you deem relevant to feeling better about yourself-within reason, of course. If Selma wanted to get her teeth capped, why should Cecilia give a shit? What I said was, “I got the impression she was devoted to Tom.”

“As well she should have been. And he to her, I might add. Tom spent his life trying to satisfy the woman. If it wasn’t one thing, it was another. First, she had to have a house. Then she wanted something bigger in a better neighborhood. Then they had to join the country club. And on and on it went. Anytime she didn’t get what she wanted? Well, she pouted and sulked until he broke down and got it for her. It was pitiful in my opinion. Tom did everything he could, but there wasn’t any way to make her happy.”

I said, “My goodness.” This is the way I talk in situations like this. I could not, for the life of me, think where to go from here. “He was a nice-looking man. I saw a picture of him at the house,” I said, vamping.

“He was downright handsome. Why he married Selma was a mystery to rne. And that son of hers?” Cecilia pulled her lips together like a drawstring purse. “Brant was a pain in the grits from the first time I ever laid eyes on the boy. He had a mouth on him like a trucker and he was bratty to boot. Back talk and sass? You never heard the like. Did poorly in school, too. Problems with his temper and what they call his impulse control. Of course, Selma thought he was a saint. She . wouldn’t tolerate a word of criticism regardless of what’ he did. Poor Tom nearly tore his hair out. I guess he finally managed to get the boy squared away, but it was no thanks to her.”

“She mentioned Brant worked as a paramedic. That’s a responsible job.”

“Well, that’s true enough,” she conceded grudgingly. “About time he took hold. You can credit Tom for that. ”

“Do you happen to know where Tom was going that night? I understand he was found somewhere on the outskirts of town.”

“A mile north of here.”

“He didn’t drop in to see you?”

“I wish he had,” she said. “I was visiting a friend down in Independence and didn’t get back here until shortly after ten fifteen or so. I saw the ambulance pass, but I had no idea it was meant for him.”

FOUR

Tuesday morning at nine, I stopped by the offices of the Nota County Coroner. I hadn’t slept well the night before. The cabin was poorly insulated and the night air was frigid. I’d moved the thermostat up to 70, but all it did was click off and on ineffectually. I’d crawled into bed wearing my sweats, a turtleneck, and a pair of heavy socks. The mattress was as turgid as a trough of mud. I curled up under a comforter, a quilt, and a wool blanket, with my heavy leather jacket piled on top for the weight. just about the time I got warm, my bladder announced that it was filled to capacity and required my immediate attention or a bout of bedwetting would ensue. I tried to ignore the discomfort and then realized I’d never sleep a wink until I’d heeded the message. By the time I got back under the covers, all the ambient heat had been dispelled and I was forced to suffer through the cold again until I drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up at seven, my nose felt like a Popsicle and my breath was visible in puffs against the wan morning light. I showered in tepid water, dried myself shivering, and dressed in haste. Then I dog trotted down the road to the Rainbow Cafe where I stoked up on another breakfast, sucking down orange juice, coffee, sausages, and pancakes saturated with butter and syrup. I told myself I needed all the sugar and fat to refuel my depleted reserves, but the truth was I felt sorry for myself and the food was the simplest form of consolation.

The coroner’s office was located on a side street in the heart of the downtown. In Nota County, the coroner is a four-year elected official, who in this case doubled as the funeral director for the county’s only mortuary. Nota County is small, less than two thousand square miles, tucked like an afterthought between Inyo and Mono counties. The coroner, Wilton Kirchner III, generally referred to as Trey, had occupied the position for the past ten years. Since there was no requirement for formal training in forensic medicine, all coroner’s cases were autopsied by a forensic pathologist under contract to the county.

In the event of a homicide in the county, the Nota County Coroner handles the on-scene investigation, in conjunction with the Sheriffs Department’s investigator and an investigator from the Nota County District Attorney’s office. The forensic autopsy is then conducted in the “big city” by a pathologist who does several homicide autopsies per month and is called to court numerous times during the year to testify. Since Nota County only has one homicide every two years or so, the coroner prefers that an outside agency provide its expertise, in both autopsy services and testimony.

Kirchner Sons Mortuary appeared to have been a private residence at one time, probably built in the early twenties with the town growing up around it. The architectural style was Tudor with a facade of pale red brick trimmed in dark-painted timbers. Thin cold sunlight glittered against the leaded glass windows. The surrounding lawns were dormant, the grass as drab and brittle as brown plastic. Only the holly bushes lent any color to the landscape. I could imagine a time when the house might have sat on a sizeable piece of land, but now the property had shrunk and the lots on either side sported commercial establishments: a real estate office and a modest medical complex.

Trey Kirchner came out to the reception area when he heard I was there, extending a hand in greeting as he introduced himself. “Trey Kirchner,” he said. “Selma called and said you’d be in here today. Nice to meet you, Miss Millhone. Come on back to my office and let’s find out what you need.”

Kirchner was in his mid-fifties, tall, broadshouldered, with a waistline only slightly softer than it might have been ten years before. His hair was a clean gray, parted on the side and trimmed short around his ears. His smile was pleasant, creating concentric creases on either side of his mouth. He wore glasses with large lenses and thin metal frames. The corners of his eyes drooped slightly, somehow creating an expression of immense sympathy. His suit was close-fitting, well pressed, and the dress shirt he wore looked freshly starched. His tie was conservative, but not somber. Altogether, he presented an air of comforting competence. There was something solid about him; a man who, by nature, looked like he could absorb all the sorrow, confusion, and rage generated by death.

I followed him down a long corridor and into his office, which had served as the dining room when the house was first built. The carpet was pale, the wood floors pickled to the color of milk-washed pine. The drapes were beige, silk or shantung, some fabric with a touch of sheen. The mortuary decor leaned to wainscoting, topped with wallpaper murals showing soft mountain landscapes, forests of ever-greens with paths meandering through the woods. This was a watercolor world; pastel skies piled with clouds, the faintest suggestion of a breeze touching the tips of the wallpaper trees. On either side of the corridor at intervals, wide sliding doors had been pushed back to reveal the slumber rooms, empty of inhabitants, bare except for the ranks of gray metal folding chairs and a few potted ferns. The air was cool, underheated, spiced with the scent of carnations though none were in view. Perhaps it was some weird form of mortuary air freshener wafting through the vents. The entire environment seemed geared to somnambulistic calm.

The office we entered seemed designed for the public, not a book, a file, or a piece of paper in sight. I suspected somewhere in the building Trey Kirchner had an office where the real work was done. Somewhere out of sight, too, was the autopsy paraphernalia: cameras, X-ray equipment, stainless steel table, Stryker saw, scalpels, hanging scale. The room where we sat was as bland as a pudding-no smell of formalin, no murky Mason Jars filled with snippets of organs-giving no indication of the mechanics of the body’s preparation for cremation or burial.

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