He sighed, then took a shaky breath and rolled onto his left side, opening his eyes again. He tried to sit up, with great success.
He saw the dragon.
“AAAAAAHHH!” he screamed as he fell back. The dragon gleamed like a vast mountain of burnished golden hue. Huge dark eyes watched him impassively beneath thick scaled ridges. The monster’s head nearly brushed against the distant painted ceiling. A great set of ivory claws rested not two feet away from Lemborg, each of the five claws longer than Lemborg’s legs.
“More water?” asked the dragon with concern. The great clawed foot beside the gnome lifted soundlessly away from him, formed itself into a cup, and dipped into a broad metal tub nearby. Water cascaded from the claws as they lifted away again and rushed at the gnome with frightening speed.
He scrambled back but was drenched in a second from head to foot. Racked with coughing, Lemborg flailed his arms hysterically.
He dimly sensed that something very large had moved close to him. The air grew exceedingly hot.
“You will have no fear,” said the dragon, quoting a spell. The air around Lemborg burned as if a great oven door had opened. The dragon’s words sang through the gnome’s body, then came to fiery life and leaped into his mind.
Lemborg fell back, arms dropping to the floor at his sides. He coughed a bit, caught his breath, then sat up once more. The dragon had assumed its original position and now watched him with patient eyes.
“No more water, thanks!” the wet gnome shouted quickly. “Feeling just fine now, quite fine. Sorry for the fright show there. Not much chance to see a dragon close up before, not around home, anyway. Just in the books. Obviously, dragons are much bigger in real life. Simply caught me off guard.” He glanced behind him to make sure there were no more surprises.
“I am pleased,” said the dragon, leaving Lemborg a trifle confused as to just which of his remarks the dragon was pleased about. The dragon turned its head slightly to favor the gnome with its right eye. The gnome thought the gesture almost regal. The dragon never wasted movement, doing only what it needed to do and no more.
“We should be introduced,” the dragon prompted. Hot, dry air blew against Lemborg’s face. The breeze smelled like burned sand. Lemborg’s scalp itched, and he quickly curled his chapped lips inward to wet them.
“Ah. Certainly.” The gnome carefully got to his feet, brushed off his orange flight suit, and straightened up to face the dragon. (He had an idea floating in the back of his mind that facing a live dragon was extremely dangerous, but for some reason it didn’t seem to be worth worrying about.) “Aerodynamics Guild technician-pilot fourth class Lemborgamontgoloferpaddersonrite. The short form of the name, of course, but humans butcher it to Lemborg. If there is just a moment to spare, there is the longer short form of it, which should take no more than a half hour, or the full form, which-”
“Another time, perhaps,” said the dragon with finality. The gnome fell silent. “Lemborg, you may call me Kalkon, which of course is the short form of my own name. I will not trouble you with the longer form.” The dragon lifted its snout the slightest bit. “I complimented you earlier on the manner of your arrival here in the so-called Northern Wastes of Solamnia. The show was pleasingly extravagant, as spectacular as the great sand-devil of 353, which carried off the Great Temple’s western tower here. I watched the scene in its entirety from the doorway of the constables’ main barracks. A very destructive expenditure of energy, to be sure, and one that required a spell of healing on my part to aid your recovery”-the dragon put emphasis on that last part- “but I do applaud your style. You must be well regarded among your fellow wizards.”
The gnome’s mouth drifted open in surprise. “What? Oh! Not a wizard, thanks, but rather with the Mount Nevermind Aerodynamics Guild instead. Not a wizard, no, no relation at all. And thank you for the spell. Quite pleasant, actually. Eh …” Lemborg turned again to look around the room, a huge empty hall. “Just landed a technojammer here, but… um, it seems to have been misplaced just now. Seem to have misplaced the landing zone, too-was aiming for Mount Nevermind. Hope that new-model technojammer isn’t lost or … anything. Perhaps some light could be shed on just where that silly thing seems to have-“