“It must be something like I felt when my boys were young and dependent on me to fulfill all their needs—like the way Jack and I worked together in the early years when we struggled just to make ends meet.”
Gyda nodded, although she probably didn’t understand half of what Ruby said.
Ruby paced her little room restlessly that night, unable to fall asleep in the chamber’s claustrophobic heat. If only she could walk along the river until her energy burned out, she would fall into bed exhausted, too tired to dream, or worry, or think about all her problems.
Ruby felt more lonely and depressed than she had since this whole escapade started. There was no one—no one at all—she could turn to for help. And she couldn’t run away from the problem, either, as she’d been escaping in her work the last two years.
Where did that thought come from? Ruby wondered.
It was true, Ruby admitted suddenly, dropping once again onto her bed. Jack may have just left her days before, but it should have been no surprise. If she were truly honest with herself, she would have to admit that she’d known for more than a year that they had serious problems. And she’d done nothing about it, except bury herself in her new company.
Ruby’s sudden insight troubled her. She grimaced. How could she have been so dense? Why hadn’t she done something earlier to prevent the breakup of her marriage?
The answer was all too clear. She’d wanted it all—marriage, children, a career—without conceding anything. The unrealistic ideal that women of her time raced to achieve was a myth, Ruby realized. Modern women were running in place. It was impossible for a woman—or man, for that matter—to give one hundred percent to career, marriage and family without one of them suffering.
In her selfishness, she hadn’t wanted to give up any of it. She’d pretended the problems didn’t exist. Then look what happened. She’d lost it all.
Ruby put her face in her hands, but the thoughts wouldn’t go away. Was Jack having these same self-recriminations? Was he sitting on the back-porch swing at the lake house missing her, remembering how good their marriage had been before it started splintering apart, bit by precious bit?
“Is something troubling you?” Gyda asked from the doorway, interrupting Ruby’s painful reminiscence. “Olaf and I heard you moving around.”
“Do Vikings allow divorce?” Ruby asked suddenly.
Gyda looked surprised at her question but answered, “Certainly. ‘Tis not a common occurrence, but, yea, ’tis permitted.”
Ruby motioned her to sit on the chair. In the dim candlelight, Gyda looked much younger with her unplaited hair hanging thick and straight down to the waist of her loose nightdress. Gyda sat silently, apparently sensing Ruby’s troubled mind, waiting patiently for her to speak.
“My husband has left me. He wants a divorce,” Ruby confided miserably.
Gyda’s shoulders sagged wearily, and she put a hand to her forehead. “Which husband? Thork? Or the other one?”
“Jack. After twenty years of marriage, Jack left me. Well, actually, Thork left, too, in a way, when he locked me up, and now again in abandoning me here to go to his grandfather’s.”
“Do you really believe all these things you say?”
“Of course. Do you doubt that Jack wants a divorce?”
“No-o-o,” Gyda drawled out hesitantly. “Why did this Jack leave you?”
“He said I neglected him and my sons, that I loved my career more than I loved him.”
“Was he right?”
Ruby sat looking at Gyda dolefully before she whispered, “Yes. Yes, I think he was right.”
Gyda took Ruby into her arms then. Ruby cried out her pain on the Viking woman’s shoulder.
Chapter Six
Three days later Thork and his companions rode their horses into the side yard of Olaf’s home.
Thork’s brows shot up at the sight of Ruby sitting like a bloody queen in the shade of a tree near the river. A dozen giggling children surrounded her adoringly, like loyal subjects pleading for “just one more story.” Ulf stood watchfully off to the side.
After dismounting, Thork handed his reins to Selik, who annoyed him with a pointed smirk in Ruby’s direction before riding toward the barn. He’d already warned the hot-blooded youth to stay away from Astrid if he valued his neck. Cnut followed close behind, barely stifling a laugh.