“She’s caused you enough grief,” Tracy said. “It seems to me she owes you something.”
“Gosh, the media could be a big help,” Kim said. “Not only with the Marsha problem, but also with the whole meat-contamination issue.”
“The more I think about this, the better I like it,” Tracy said. “Maybe I can help you convince her.”
Kim looked appreciatively at his former wife. With the bitterness of the divorce and the rancor of the custody issues he’d forgotten how warmly attractive she was. “You know, Trace,” he said, “I’m really thankful that you came to court this morning and not just because you made the effort to raise the bail. I’m just thankful you’re willing to be with me after all that’s happened.”
Tracy looked over at Kim. The remark was so out of character for him, yet seeing his eyes she knew he was sincere. “That’s a very nice thing to say,” she told him.
“I mean it,” Kim said.
“Well, I appreciate your saying it,” Tracy said. “I can’t remember the last time you thanked me for anything. In fact, it must have been before we were ever married.”
“I know,” Kim admitted. “You’re right. I had a little time to think last night in jail, and I have to say that the events over the last twenty-four hours, particularly concerning Becky, have opened my eyes.”
“Opened your eyes to what?” Tracy asked.
“To what’s really important in life,” Kim said. “I suppose that sounds melodramatic, but I’ve realized I’ve made a terrible mistake. I’ve focused too much on career and competition, at the expense of family. And us.”
“I’m impressed to hear you say such a thing,” Tracy said. This did not sound like the Kim she’d divorced.
“I’m afraid I’ve been selfish all my adult life,” Kim continued. “It’s a little ironic since the whole time I’ve been hiding behind the facade of the charitable, selfless physician. Like a child, I’ve needed constant praise and constant reinforcement, and being a surgeon was a perfect fit.”
“All this makes me feel sad and ashamed. It also makes me want to apologize to you and wish I could take back a number of wasted years.”
“I’m surprised and overwhelmed,” Tracy said. “But I accept. I’m impressed by your insight.”
“Thanks,” Kim said simply. He stared out the windshield. They had turned onto the side road and were approaching Higgins and Hancock. The building looked peaceful and clean under the dusting of snow.
“Is this it?” Tracy asked.
Kim nodded. “The entrance to the parking lot is coming up,” he said. “My car should be right in front of the main door. At least that’s where I left it.”
Tracy turned where Kim indicated. Kim’s car was immediately apparent. It was standing in total isolation. There were only two other cars in the lot, but they were all the way at the end of the plant.
“Marsha’s car was parked where those two cars are,” Kim mentioned. “Maybe there’s an employee entrance over there.”
Tracy pulled up alongside of Kim’s car. She stopped and set the emergency brake.
Kim pointed to the record-room window that he’d smashed to gain entrance into the building. It had been boarded up. He explained to Tracy he’d done it with one of the large rocks lining the parking lot.
“What’s the plan?” Tracy asked when Kim paused.
Kim sighed. “I’ve got to get to the hospital. Tom’s agreed to look in on my patients, but I have to see them too. Then I’ll go see Kelly Anderson. I happen to know where she lives.”
“We have some decisions to make concerning Becky,” Tracy said.
Kim nodded but looked off in the distance.
“I know it is difficult,” Tracy said. “But we have to make funeral arrangements. It might even help us accept her death.”
Kim bit his lip.
“Anger and denial are part of the grieving process,” Tracy said when Kim didn’t respond. “I’m guilty of using them as well as you, but we do have responsibilities.”
Kim turned to face Tracy. There were tears in the corners of his eyes. “You’re right,” he admitted. “But, as I said, I need a little more time because of what’s happened. Would it be too much to ask for you to go ahead and make the arrangements without me? I know it’s asking a lot. I’ll certainly agree to anything you decide, and, of course, I’ll be there for the service. I’d just like to follow up on this Kelly Anderson idea immediately.”