“Eddie and I were lovers,” Winton said calmly, with great resignation.
I gathered my argument and spat it out: “Mr. Winton, we have a signed confession. We also have eyewitnesses who will testify to having seen Engels’s car on Harold Way on the night of the murder. You are opening yourself up to an accessory rap if you go public with your story.”
Canfield eyed me coldly. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Lorna sitting rigid, fuming. “My client is a man of courage, Officer,” Canfield said. “Edward Engels’s life is at stake. Thad Green is an old friend of mine, as is the district attorney. Mr. Winton’s affidavit will be delivered this afternoon. Mr. Winton realizes the police will have many questions for him; I will be present at the questioning. Mr. Winton is a prominent man; you will not beat any confession out of him. I came here to talk to you only because Lorna is an old friend and I respect her judgment of people. She told me you were concerned with justice, and I believed her . . .”
“I _am_ concerned with justice, and . . .”
I couldn’t finish. My resistance crumbled in a heap, and I felt my vision darken at the corner of my eyes. I picked up a heavy quartz bookend from Lorna’s desk and hurled it at the glass part of her office door. The glass shattered outward and the bookend landed on the corridor floor with a loud bang. My hands were aching to hit something, so I mashed them together and closed my eyes, fighting tears and tremors. I heard Canfield say goodbye to Lorna, and heard footsteps as he ushered his client out the halfdestroyed door.
“I believe Winton,” Lorna said finally.
“So do I,” I said.
“Freddy, Dudley Smith convinced the D.A. to let him head an investigation into a half-dozen unsolved homicides. He wants to pin them on Eddie Engels.”
“Jesus, crazy Dudley. Is this guy Canfield a hotshot? He looks familiar.”
“He’s one of the finest, highest-paid criminal lawyers on the West Coast.”
“And Winton has got money?”
“Yes, he’s very wealthy. He owns two textile plants in Long Beach.”
Still looking for outs, I persisted. “And Canfield is buddies with Thad Green and the D.A.?”
“Yes.”
“Then Engels will go free and Dudley Smith and I will be up shit’s creek without a paddle.”
I looked through the gaping glass hole in the door, searching for something that would stop up the now-gaping hole in my life. “I’m sorry about the door, Lorna,” was all I could think of.
Lorna pushed her swivel chair over to where I was sitting. “Are you sorry for Eddie Engels?” she asked.
“Yes,” I said.
Lorna kissed me softly on the lips. “Then let justice be done. It’s out of your hands now.”
I pushed Lorna away from me. I didn’t want to believe her. “And what about Maggie Cadwallader?” I shouted. I turned around to look at the hole in the door. Three men in suits were looking in on us.
“You okay, Lorna?” one of them asked.
Lorna nodded. They departed, looking skeptical. I could hear glass being swept up.
“What _about_ Maggie Cadwallader?” Lorna asked. “Did you want revenge for her, or was this whole crusade just an exercise in wonder that went bad?”
Suddenly I wanted to hurt Lorna as I had never wanted to hurt anyone before. “I fucked Maggie Cadwallader on the same day I met you. I picked her up at the Silver Star bar and took her to her apartment and fucked her. That was how I got involved in this thing, how I knew where to look for evidence. I knew if I found the killer my career would skyrocket. I wanted you from the first moment I saw you. I wanted to have you, to fuck you, to make you mine. That was why I involved you in this; it was just another seduction in a whole fucking long line of them.”
I didn’t wait for Lorna to respond. I walked out of her office, not looking back.
I drove aimlessly, the way I had on the night I had met Maggie Cadwallader. I bought a copy of the L.A. _Mirror_. Engels’s arraignment was on the front page. “‘I Am Not A Homo!’ Killer Screams.” Yellow journalism at its best. The account revealed that Engels had had to be restrained and dragged out of the courtroom by three muscular bailiffs after submitting his plea of not guilty.