Phule’s Paradise by Robert Asprin

PROLOGUE

The view from General Blitzkrieg’s window was uninspired to say the most, surveying a cramped parking lot and a blank wall badly in need of repainting or tearing down. In some ways, however, it typified the status of the Space Legion, or lack thereof. Perpetually strapped for funding, even the space for its headquarters was rented, and the area was very low rent indeed. That Blitzkrieg’s office had a window at all was a sign of his lofty standing in that organization.

“Excuse me, sir?”

The general turned from staring out the window to find an aide poised in the door of his office.

“Yes?”

“You asked to be notified as soon as Colonel Battleax left on her vacation,” the aide said without formality. Salutes, like views, were optional in the Legion, and therefore very rare indeed.

“You’re sure she’s gone? You saw her take off yourself?”

“Well, sir, I saw her shuttle lift off and then return without her. The ship she had reservations on has left orbit, so I assume that she’s on it.”

“Good, good,” the general said, almost to himself, a rare smile flickering across his face. “And she’ll be on vacation for several months, at least.”

Due to the time necessary for space travel, even aided by faster-than-light travel, vacations tended to be long, so the aide found nothing unusual about the length of Battleax’s sabbatical, especially considering she had been accumulating time for several years. The aide was, however, puzzled by the general’s attitude and interest in it. It was surprising that Blitzkrieg, as one of the three directors of the Space Legion, would take such a concern in the long-overdue vacation of a lowly colonel.