Llewllyn arched an eyebrow. “Do you not believe in the Sparrow’s magic?”
“What I just saw was another branch of magic, what I call applied psychology-which by the way you have a talent for-“ Llewllyn acknowledged the compliment with a gracious nod, “-but what was that business about a curse on anyone who steals those whiffleberries? The bloating, suffering and stuff?”
“Those are the usual effects of eating green whiffleberries,” Llewllyn said dryly. “And if you were from these parts, and if you were not distracted by some stupid neighborhood feud, you would know that whiffleberries will not ripen for another moon or so.”
Wiz looked at his assistant. “You may have more talent for this than I thought.”
Next, not at all to Wiz’s surprise, was the chicken man. He strutted through the door, neck out like a bantam rooster, and two chickens clutched in his skinny hand. He nodded to the two consultants and plunked the two birds down on the table. The birds squawked and shifted and tried to stand up, something they couldn’t quite manage with their feet tied together. So they settled for sitting on the table and complaining in an undertone.
“I’m here about my chickens,” he announced. “They still won’t lay eggs.” He jabbed a bony finger at Wiz, “And don’t give me none of your lip about dragons, boy, the mayor hisself says you’re to help me.”
I’ll bet the mayor loved having someone to palm you off on, Wiz thought, but he only nodded pleasantly. “I wouldn’t dream of it now that the council has renegotiated the contract. My associate here will take care of your problem.”
The man scowled at Llewllyn. “He’s younger than you are,” he grumbled.
“Prettier too.”
Llewllyn simply nodded and picked up one of the chickens. “Hmm,” he said stroking the bird’s feathers. He prodded the fowl gently. “Ah, yess.” Then he studied the bird’s eyes. “Quite so,” he said, lifting the chicken higher to study its feet. “Uh huh.”
By this point the chicken was thoroughly confused by these goings-on, and Wiz and the bird’s owner weren’t much better.
“Yes,” Llewllyn said at last, “I see the problem clearly.”
“If you can do that you’re better than the rest of them so-called magicians,” the chicken man said. “But what are you going to do about it? That’s what I want to know.”
The bard put the chicken down on the table. “Why my good man, I’m going to solve your problem. That’s what we wizards, ah, consultants, are here for. Now this is a difficult case. The causes are obviously complex and subtle. I will not go into the boring details, but suffice it to say that the cure is straightforward. Simply pluck a sprig of tansy and place it above the door to your henhouse.”
“That’s it? That’s all?”
Llewllyn smiled a superior smile. “The secret is in knowing the cure, not in performing it.” Then he leaned over the clucking chickens and waggled his finger under the man’s nose. “But this is most important. Do not go into the hen house until the moon has waned and waxed again. Feed and water your chickens outside the coop but otherwise do not go near them.”
“Why?”
“Because during this delicate period it would not be safe. You might contract the dread-“ his voice lowered to a near whisper “-chicken pox.”
“Oh, right. Of course. I’ll do just as you say. Thank you sir. Thank you.”
With that the man gathered his chickens and strutted out.
“Chicken pox, huh?” Wiz said when the man had left, birds dangling.
Llewllyn shrugged. “Not my most inspired invention, I will admit, but it should suffice.”
“And tansy?”
“The stuff’s a roadside weed around here and it stinks. The smell makes them think it’s powerful. Like putting alum in medicine so it will taste bad.”
“What do you think he’s going to do if his chickens don’t improve?”
“Oh, they will improve.” Llewllyn’s face screwed up as if he was thinking of something unpleasant. “My Lord, I have a certain experience with chickens. The only thing wrong with those birds is that he is pestering them to death. If he leaves them alone they will settle down and all will be well. And if not-“ Again the shrug. “I will simply tell him he must obtain a coal black cock without a speck of white upon him. That should occupy him for a few moons.”