Waldo by Robert Heinlein

The skycar seemed quite ordinary. Stevens examined the deKalbs and saw some faint chalk marks on their metal sides – nothing else unusual. ‘Watch while I cut in reception,’ McLeod told him

Stevens waited, heard the faint hum as the circuits became activized, and looked

The antennae of the deKalbs, each a rigid pencil of metal,were bending, flexing, writhing like a cluster of worms. They were reaching out, like fingers

Stevens remained squatting down by the deKalbs, watching their outrageous motion. McLeod left the control saddle, came back, and joined him. ‘Well, chief,’ he demanded, ‘tell me about it. Whaduh yuh make of it?

‘Got a cigarette?

‘What are those things sticking Out of your pocket?

‘Oh! Yeah – sure.’ Stevens took one out, lighted it, and burned it halfway down, unevenly, with two long drags

‘Go on,’ McLeod urged. ‘Give us a tell. What makes it do that?

‘Well,’ Stevens said slowly, ‘I can think of three things to do next-

‘Yeah?

“The first is to fire Dr Rambeau and give his job to Gramps Schneider.

‘That’s a good idea in any case.

‘The second is to just wait here quietly until the boys with the strait-jackets show up to take us home.

‘And what’s the third?

‘The third,’ Stevens said savagely, ‘is to take this damned heap out and sink it in the deepest part of the Atlantic Ocean and pretend like it never happened!

A mechanic stuck his head in the door of the car. ‘Oh, Dr Stevens–

‘Get out of here!

The head hastily withdrew; thc voice picked up in aggrieved tones. ‘Message from the head office.

Stevens got up, went to the operator’s saddle, cleared the board, then assured himself that the antennae had ceased their disturbing movements. They had; in fact, they appeared so beautifully straight and rigid that he was again tempted to doubt the correctness of his own senses. He climbed out to the floor of the hangar, McLeod behind him. ‘Sorry to have blasted at you, Whitey,’ he said to the workman in placating tones. ‘What is the message?

‘Mr Gleason would like for you to come into his office as soon as you can.

‘I will at once. And, Whitey, I’ve a job for you.

‘Yeah?

‘This heap here – seal up its doors and don’t let anybody monkey with it. Then have it dragged, dragged, mind you; don’t try to start it – have it dragged over into the main lab.

‘OK.

Stevens started away; McLeod stopped him. ‘What do I go home in?

‘Oh yes, it’s your personal property, isn’t it? Tell you what, Mac – the company needs it. Make out a purchase order and I’ll sign it.

‘Weeell, now – I don’t rightly know as I want to sell it. It might be the only job in the country working properly before long.

‘Don’t be silly. If the others play out, it won’t do you any good to have the only one in working order. Power will be shut down.

‘I suppose there’s that,’ McLeod conceded. ‘Still,’ he said, brightening visibly, ‘a crate like that, with its special talents, ought to be worth a good deal more than list. You couldn’t just go out and buy one.

‘Mac,’ said Stevens, ‘you’ve got avarice in your heart and thievery in your fingertips. How much do you want for it?

‘Suppose we say twice the list price, new. That’s letting you off easy.

‘I happen to know you bought that job at a discount. But go ahead. Either the company can stand it, or it won’t make much difference in the bankruptcy.

Gleason looked up as Stevens came in. ‘Oh, there you are, Jim. You seemed to have pulled a miracle with our friend Waldo the Great. Nice work.

‘How much did he stick us for?

‘Just his usual contract. Of course his usual contract is a bit like robbery with violence. But it will be worth it if he is successful. And it’s on a straight contingent basis. He must feel pretty sure of himself. They say he’s never lost a contingent fee in his life. Tell me – what is he like? Did you really get into his house?

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