pockets, to run away with goods from a fire, or other public
confusion, to snatch anything from a woman or child, to strip a
house when the door is open, or any other branch of a thief’s
profession.
In short, it is a nursery for thieves and villains; modest women
are every day insulted by them and their strumpets; and such
children who run about the streets, or those servants who go on
errands, do but too frequently bring home some scraps of their
beastly profane wit; insomuch, that the conversation of our lower
rank of people runs only upon bawdy and blasphemy, notwithstanding
our societies for reformation, and our laws in force against
profaneness; for this lazy life gets them many proselytes, their
numbers daily increasing from runaway apprentices and footboys,
insomuch that it is a very hard matter for a gentleman to get him a
servant, or for a tradesman to find an apprentice.
Innumerable other mischiefs accrue, and others will spring up from
this race of caterpillars, who must be swept from out our streets,
or we shall be overrun with all manner of wickedness.
But the subject is so low, it becomes disagreeable even to myself;
give me leave, therefore, to propose a way to clear the streets of
these vermin, and to substitute as many honest industrious persons
in their stead, who are now starving for want of bread, while these
execrable villains live, though in rags and nastiness, yet in
plenty and luxury.
I, therefore, humbly propose that these vagabonds be put
immediately under the command of such taskmasters as the government
shall appoint, and that they be employed, punished, or rewarded,
according to their capacities and demerits; that is to say, the
industrious and docible to woolcombing, and other parts of the
woollen manufacture, where hands are wanted, as also to husbandry
and other parts of agriculture.
For it is evident that there are scarce hands enow in the country
to carry on either of these affairs. Now, these vagabonds might
not only by this means be kept out of harm’s way, but be rendered
serviceable to the nation. Nor is there any need of transporting
them beyond seas, for if any are refractory they should be sent to
our stannaries and other mines, to our coal works and other places
where hard labour is required. And here I must offer one thing
never yet thought of, or proposed by any, and that is, the keeping
in due repair the navigation of the river Thames, so useful to our
trade in general; and yet of late years such vast hills of sand are
gathered together in several parts of the river, as are very
prejudicial to its navigation, one which is near London Bridge,
another near Whitehall, a third near Battersea, and a fourth near
Fulham. These are of very great hindrance to the navigation; and
indeed the removal of them ought to be a national concern, which I
humbly propose may be thus effected.
The rebellious part of these vagabonds, as also other thieves and
offenders, should be formed into bodies under the command of proper
officers, and under the guard and awe of our soldiery. These
should every day at low water carry away these sandhills, and
remove every other obstruction to the navigation of this most
excellent and useful river.
It may be objected that the ballast men might do this; that as fast
as the hills are taken away they would gather together again, or
that the watermen might do it. To the first, I answer, that
ballast men, instead of taking away from these hills, make holes in
other places of the river, which is the reason so many young
persons are drowned when swimming or bathing in the river.
Besides, it is a work for many hands, and of long continuance; so
that ballast men do more harm than good. The second objection is
as silly; as if I should never wash myself, because I shall be
dirty again, and I think needs no other answer. And as to the
third objection, the watermen are not so public-spirited, they live
only from hand to mouth, though not one of them but finds the