The Star Beast by Robert A. Heinlein

“Technicians?”

“Didn’t I say? Mrs. Murgatroyd will interview us, with Pidgie-Widgie in her lap and taking part. Then they’ll patch it into the show. A wonderful boost for the department.”

“No!”

“Eh? Mr. Kiku, did I understand you correctly?”

“Mr. Secretary,” Mr. Kiku said tensely, “I couldn’t possibly do that. I. . . I’m subject to stage fright.”

“What? Why, that’s absurd! You helped me open the Triangular Conference. You spoke without notes for thirty minutes.”

“That’s different. That’s shop talk, with other professionals.”

The Secretary frowned. “I hate to insist, if it really makes you nervous. But Mrs. Murgatroyd asked for you especially. You see. . .” MacClure looked mildly embarrassed. ‘. . . Pidgie-Widgie preaches racial tolerance and so forth. Brothers under the skin. . . the sort of thing we all want to encourage. So?”

Mr. Kiku said fimly, “I’m sorry.”

“Come now! Surely you’re not going to force me to insist?”

“Mr. Secretary,” Kiku answered quietly, “you will find that my job description does not require me to be a stereovision actor. If you will give me a written order, I will submit it to our legal bureau for opinion, then answer you officially.”

Mr. MacClure frowned. “Henry, you can be a stubborn little beast, can’t you? I wonder how you got so high in the heap?”

Mr. Kiku did not answer; MacClure went on, “I won’t let you pull the rule book on me; I’m too old a fox. Though I must say I didn’t think you would do that tome.”

“Sorry, sir. I really am.”

“So am I. I’ll try to. convince you that it is important to the department, whether a civil servant can be ordered to do it or not. You see, Beulah Murgatroyd is the power behind ‘The Friends of Lummox.’ So. . .”

“‘The Friends of Lummox’?”

“I knew you would see it differently. After all, you’ve been handling that whoop-te-do. Therefore. . .”

“What in heaven’s name are ‘The Friends of Lummox’?”

“Why, you set up the original interview with them yourself. But if I hadn’t happened to lunch with Wes Robbins, we might have missed the boat on it.”

“I seem to recall a memorandum. A routine matter.”

“Mrs. Murgatroyd is not routine, I’ve been trying to tell you. You precedent-and-protocol boys lose touch with the people. If you don’t mind my saying so, that’s why you never quite get to the top.”

“I don’t mind in the least,” Mr. Kiku said gently.

“Eh?” The Secretary looked slightly embarrassed. “I mean, there’s a place for a grass-roots politician, like me, with his finger on the pulse.. . though I admit I don’t have your special training. You see?”

“There is work for both our talents, sir. But go on. Perhaps I did ‘miss the boat’ in this instance. The ‘Friends of Lummox’ memorandum must have come through before the name meant anything to me.”

“Probably. I wasn’t criticizing your attention to duty, Henry. Fact is, you work too hard. . . the universe won’t run down if you don’t wind it. But about this F. of L. deal-we intervened in some silly case out west; you know about it, you sent one of our people-the case turned out to be about his Hoorussian Lummox, The court’s verdict. . . our verdict, you might say, was to destroy the beast. By the way, Henry, have you disciplined the man responsible?”

“No, sir.”

“Why the delay?”

“He won’t be disciplined, sir. He was perfectly right, on the evidence.”

“I don’t see it that way. Better send his file jacket to my office. I want to consider it myself.”

“Sir,” Mr. Kiku said softly, “were you thinking of reversing me on a matter of administrative discipline?”

“Eh? I intend to review the matter.”

“Because if you are, sir, you can have my resignation now. My usefulness will be at an end.”

“What? Henry, don’t be nasty.” The Secretary drummed on Mr. Kiku’s desk. “Confound it, mann, let’s be frank with each other. I know that you career men can make it hard for an appointee if you try. . . I didn’t get into politics yesterday. But as long as I am holding the sack, I intend to have discipline around here. My privilege?”