Dickens, Charles – A Child’s History of England

next morning, she very quietly died, in the forty-fifth year of her

reign.

That reign had been a glorious one, and is made for ever memorable

by the distinguished men who flourished in it. Apart from the

great voyagers, statesmen, and scholars, whom it produced, the

names of BACON, SPENSER, and SHAKESPEARE, will always be remembered

with pride and veneration by the civilised world, and will always

impart (though with no great reason, perhaps) some portion of their

lustre to the name of Elizabeth herself. It was a great reign for

discovery, for commerce, and for English enterprise and spirit in

general. It was a great reign for the Protestant religion and for

the Reformation which made England free. The Queen was very

popular, and in her progresses, or journeys about her dominions,

was everywhere received with the liveliest joy. I think the truth

is, that she was not half so good as she has been made out, and not

half so bad as she has been made out. She had her fine qualities,

but she was coarse, capricious, and treacherous, and had all the

faults of an excessively vain young woman long after she was an old

one. On the whole, she had a great deal too much of her father in

her, to please me.

Many improvements and luxuries were introduced in the course of

these five-and-forty years in the general manner of living; but

cock-fighting, bull-baiting, and bear-baiting, were still the

national amusements; and a coach was so rarely seen, and was such

an ugly and cumbersome affair when it was seen, that even the Queen

herself, on many high occasions, rode on horseback on a pillion

behind the Lord Chancellor.

CHAPTER XXXII – ENGLAND UNDER JAMES THE FIRST

‘OUR cousin of Scotland’ was ugly, awkward, and shuffling both in

mind and person. His tongue was much too large for his mouth, his

legs were much too weak for his body, and his dull goggle-eyes

stared and rolled like an idiot’s. He was cunning, covetous,

wasteful, idle, drunken, greedy, dirty, cowardly, a great swearer,

and the most conceited man on earth. His figure – what is commonly

called rickety from his birth – presented a most ridiculous

appearance, dressed in thick padded clothes, as a safeguard against

being stabbed (of which he lived in continual fear), of a grassgreen

colour from head to foot, with a hunting-horn dangling at his

side instead of a sword, and his hat and feather sticking over one

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Dickens, Charles – A Child’s History of England

eye, or hanging on the back of his head, as he happened to toss it

on. He used to loll on the necks of his favourite courtiers, and

slobber their faces, and kiss and pinch their cheeks; and the

greatest favourite he ever had, used to sign himself in his letters

to his royal master, His Majesty’s ‘dog and slave,’ and used to

address his majesty as ‘his Sowship.’ His majesty was the worst

rider ever seen, and thought himself the best. He was one of the

most impertinent talkers (in the broadest Scotch) ever heard, and

boasted of being unanswerable in all manner of argument. He wrote

some of the most wearisome treatises ever read – among others, a

book upon witchcraft, in which he was a devout believer – and

thought himself a prodigy of authorship. He thought, and wrote,

and said, that a king had a right to make and unmake what laws he

pleased, and ought to be accountable to nobody on earth. This is

the plain, true character of the personage whom the greatest men

about the court praised and flattered to that degree, that I doubt

if there be anything much more shameful in the annals of human

nature.

He came to the English throne with great ease. The miseries of a

disputed succession had been felt so long, and so dreadfully, that

he was proclaimed within a few hours of Elizabeth’s death, and was

accepted by the nation, even without being asked to give any pledge

that he would govern well, or that he would redress crying

grievances. He took a month to come from Edinburgh to London; and,

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