Phule’s Company by Robert Asprin

“Quite an assortment,” Chief Goetz said, plopping down on a bleacher seat next to the commander.

“Yes. I thought you’d find it interesting. Especially some of the plastic and rubber ‘Mercy Loads’ they’ve been developing. “

The policeman grimaced. “Of course, it’s nice if the suspect is wearing some kind of eye protection when you open up on him. If I had my way, we’d stick with either holding our fire or shooting for keeps rather than trying to kid ourselves that we can hit someone without hurting them. I’ve noticed my troops shoot a lot better on the range than they do on the street. Truth is, under pressure they’re almost as bad shots as your crew seem to be normally.”

It was apparent that the Legionnaires were far from crack shots. Whatever damage was being done to the targets was more the result of the massive amount of firepower being launched downrange than from any degree of precision in its placement.

Now it was Phule’s turn to grimace.

“I’ve seen worse, though it’s hard to recall offhand anytime I’ve seen more lousy shots gathered in one place. More important, I’ve taught worse marksmen how to shoot. I almost canceled this demonstration until I had more time to work with the troops, but this is one of Phule-Proof’s touring demos, and it was either nail it when it was available or wait a couple months until another one was in the area. Now it’s going to be a pain to keep the troops away from the full automatics and laser sights long enough to drum the basics into their heads.”