perhaps even you will leap out at me from behind the occasional door, you will
want me so much, and you will kiss me until I am mad with it. And we will be
together.
“It’s true. You will trust me, Andy. I will be faithful to you until I breathe
my very last breath. Then my spirit will be faithful. No insubstantial aura for
me. No, I will stick to you until you curse me and wish me to remove myself to
the ether. Believe me, Andy. I would never lie to you, ever.”
Kiss him until he was mad with it? I liked the sound of that. I felt his big
hand on my bottom, pressing me against him. I wanted to be even closer. He was
big, and he was strong, and I wasn’t in the least afraid of that now. I wanted
to laugh at that, laugh at how much I had changed and it was because of him, and
I would love him forever. Beyond forever. My aura would be more substantial than
his, I wanted to tell him.
He had given my life back to me. I wanted to tell him this, and I did, somewhere
deep inside of me.
I don’t know how long he spoke to me, how long he held me, and stroked me and
kissed me, but it wasn’t long enough. I never wanted him to leave. But he was
gone then. I felt George lying pressed against my side. Everything was all right.
Then there was a light, I felt it hot against my eyelids. I didn’t understand
this. No one ever came close with a candle. What was this?
I heard a soft voice saying over and over, “I haven’t gotten a chance to get to
you alone, damn them all. Always someone close to you, particularly John, may
God damn him forever for murdering my dearest Lawrence.
“I feared the drug would wear off and you would wake up, but you didn’t. For two
days now I had no chance to feed you more. But now I’m here, no one else, and
thank God you are still asleep. Now, you wretched girl, let me raise your head
so you can drink this lovely potion I mixed up especially for you. I gave it to
you that very first night, when you brought Lawrence’s dead body home, when you
brought your miserable father home and had Dr. Boulder take such excellent care
of him. And he will be well and my poor Lawrence is rotting in the cold earth. I
gave you the drug and you just collapsed, and everyone saw how distraught I was,
how I cried I was so worried about you.
“I gave you the drug one other time, watching it just slide down your throat and
lock you deeper inside yourself. Finally, you’re getting weaker, just lying here
all the time, not moving. Can you even hear me? I wonder. No one really knows.
This last drink will send you away, forever, and about time I say.”
I was afraid. Miss Crislock was speaking madness to me. She wanted me dead? She
wanted to kill me? She loved Lawrence? I felt her hands on me. No, no, I must be
dreaming, a nightmare, no more than a hideous nightmare. I frowned, wanting
desperately to wake up. And then I did. I opened my eyes and looked up into Miss
Crislock’s face.
She had a small glass in her hand filled with a milky-looking liquid.
My mouth didn’t want to work, but I knew that said aloud, “Milly? Why? What are
you doing to me? You have always loved me. Why?”
She laughed, but it wasn’t the sort of laugh anyone would ever want to hear. It
was an ugly laugh, a demented laugh, one filled with hatred. I realized that I
was the object of that hatred.
“So you heard everything, did you? I’m killing you, you miserable whelp.
Lawrence failed, but I won’t. Jameson killed your mother, and I will have to
kill him, but you must die first. That will distract everyone, and then I can
get rid of him. When your eyes simply remain closed, no one will know what