those that offend; waiting to be gracious, and willing not the
death of a sinner, but rather that he should return and live; and
even reserves damnation to the general day of retribution; that it
is a clear evidence of God and of a future state that righteous men
receive not their reward, or wicked men their punishment, till they
come into another world; and this will lead him to teach his wife
the doctrine of the resurrection and of the last judgment. Let him
but repent himself, he will be an excellent preacher of repentance
to his wife.”
I repeated all this to Atkins, who looked very serious all the
while, and, as we could easily perceive, was more than ordinarily
affected with it; when being eager, and hardly suffering me to make
an end, “I know all this, master,” says he, “and a great deal more;
but I have not the impudence to talk thus to my wife, when God and
my conscience know, and my wife will be an undeniable evidence
against me, that I have lived as if I had never heard of a God or
future state, or anything about it; and to talk of my repenting,
alas!” (and with that he fetched a deep sigh, and I could see that
the tears stood in his eyes) “’tis past all that with me.” – “Past
it, Atkins?” said I: “what dost thou mean by that?” – “I know well
enough what I mean,” says he; “I mean ’tis too late, and that is
too true.”
I told the clergyman, word for word, what he said, and this
affectionate man could not refrain from tears; but, recovering
himself, said to me, “Ask him but one question. Is he easy that it
is too late; or is he troubled, and wishes it were not so?” I put
the question fairly to Atkins; and he answered with a great deal of
passion, “How could any man be easy in a condition that must
certainly end in eternal destruction? that he was far from being
easy; but that, on the contrary, he believed it would one time or
other ruin him.” – “What do you mean by that?” said I. – “Why,” he
said, “he believed he should one time or other cut his throat, to
put an end to the terror of it.”
The clergyman shook his head, with great concern in his face, when
I told him all this; but turning quick to me upon it, says, “If
that be his case, we may assure him it is not too late; Christ will
give him repentance. But pray,” says he, “explain this to him:
that as no man is saved but by Christ, and the merit of His passion
procuring divine mercy for him, how can it be too late for any man
to receive mercy? Does he think he is able to sin beyond the power
or reach of divine mercy? Pray tell him there may be a time when
provoked mercy will no longer strive, and when God may refuse to
hear, but that it is never too late for men to ask mercy; and we,
that are Christ’s servants, are commanded to preach mercy at all
times, in the name of Jesus Christ, to all those that sincerely
repent: so that it is never too late to repent.”
I told Atkins all this, and he heard me with great earnestness; but
it seemed as if he turned off the discourse to the rest, for he
said to me he would go and have some talk with his wife; so he went
out a while, and we talked to the rest. I perceived they were all
stupidly ignorant as to matters of religion, as much as I was when
I went rambling away from my father; yet there were none of them
backward to hear what had been said; and all of them seriously
promised that they would talk with their wives about it, and do
their endeavours to persuade them to turn Christians.
The clergyman smiled upon me when I reported what answer they gave,
but said nothing a good while; but at last, shaking his head, “We