“That is not right,” Jaelle said, troubled.
Magda thought, It’s not a point of view any Darkovan can understand; so in many ways Peter is worse off than I. He is Darkovan in so many ways, he can never live at peace within the Empire; but he will
never be free to renounce those very things which would prevent him from being wholly at home in Darkover … and he will always be torn, an exile….
“Jaelle,” she said, “you -told me once that the Free Amazons were allowed to accept any lawful work. If the Terran authorities^ would give me a leave of absence to honor my obligation to the Guild-house for their training, then when I had completed it, would I be allowed to continue the work I have been doing for the Terrans?”
“Do you mean that you would spy on us?”
“No, of course not,” Magda said; the very idea was repellent. “But to build a bridge between our worlds; to help my people better understand all the small ways of your society, your language, your laws and customs-even if I did nothing more than my old work, to keep our translators from unwittingly offending against your customs; and I think I could do more, much, much more.”
“That would not violate your oath,” Jaelle said. “By our Charter you may accept any lawful work anywhere. That means that as a sworn Amazon you may work for the Terrans-” She broke off, as if she had seen a blazing light, and said almost hi a whisper, “And so can I.”
“How would that be arranged, Jaelle?”
“However you wish,” Jaelle said. “By our Charter’s laws, you must pay a portion of your earnings to the Guild. We renounce family and home, but this means that we have the protection of home and family always. Whenever you are sick, pregnant, unable to work or in a strange city, you can always turn to the Guild-house or to any Amazons there, and find a home where you can be cared for. Your tithes go to maintain the Guild-houses, and you have always sisters and friends there, and you have a lawful right to them. You need never live within a Guild-house unless you choose, although if you choose to live there you are expected to help with the maintenance of the house, to take your turn at housekeeping or gardening or whatever needs to be done. But it is our true home, where we come as others come to their family homes, wherever else we may go.”
Magda had known no family life since her father’s death; she and Peter had never seriously tried to make a home together. The thought of having a true home, a Darkovan home, to which she could go not as a stranger or a guest, but as of right, gave her a sense of warmth she had not known for years.
Jaelle said, “We can go there in old age when we are past work, or have our children fostered there.”
“You bear children, then?”
“If we wish,” Jaelle said, and the memory of Rohana’s words brought a fleeting sadness to” her face. “Did you think we took Keeper’s vows? Our daughters can be fostered in the Guild-house till they are grown, when they can choose for themselves whether to join the Guild or to marry. Our sons are usually given to their fathers to rear, after they are weaned, but if your child’s father is unwilling, or you think him unfit to raise your child, or if you do not know who fathered your child-then you can arrange to have him fostered as you wish; though no boy over five years old may live in the Guild-house.” She was thinking out loud; suddenly she came back to the present. “Well, you will learn all that during your Guild-house training, sister.”
Was it possible that she could share her two worlds? It seemed almost too good to be true. Magda said, hesitating, “You know that Lorill Hastur has forbidden contact between the Terran Zone and his people. It is easy to defy him in the Hellers, Jaelle; but here in Thendara?”
“Yes, that is one of the gravest difficulties,” Jaelle said, “but Rohana is pledged to sneak to Lorill. Her heart dwells in two worlds, too, and I think it is larger than either of them. And I think it is time that the people of Darkover, not the Comyn lords alone, knew something of the Terrans, and what they can do for our world. You heard Gabriel speak about Lorill’s ban on trade. Hastur’s will is not the voice of God, even to the Comyn! Let us find out what some of the others think. Will you come with me now to the Guild-house, sister, and see what we can do to settle this, before we meet tomorrow with Lord Hastur-and with your Terrans? Then we will know where we stand.”