The Stainless Steel Rat Sings the Blues by Harry Harrison

The sun was shining brilliantly upon the garden of our new residence when I dragged myself there next morning. Sleep had banished fatigue, which meant that I felt all the bruises that much more enthusiastically. My medication was beginning to override the pain and I dropped into a chair while I waited for beneficence to take place. Steengo came in soon after, swinging along on crutches and looking very much like I felt. He eased himself into the chair opposite me. I smiled a welcoming smile.

“Good morning, Admiral.”

“Please, Jim-I’m still Steengo.”

“Then, Steengo, since we’re alone for the moment, let me express my heartfelt thanks for breaking up the brainwashing session with Iron John. For which, unhappily, you paid quite a physical price.”

“Thank you, Jim, I appreciate that. But I had to do it. To save you from being programmed. Also-I really did lose my temper. Teddy bear indeed! A complete corruption of history.”

“No teddy bear? No golden ball?”

“The golden ball, yes. That represents innocence, the pleasures of childhood without responsibility. It is lost when we grow up. To regain this freedom the myth tells us we have to find the ball under mother’s pillow-and steal it.”

“But in a society without women you can’t have a mother -so the myth has to be rewritten?”

Steengo nodded agreement, then winced and touched the bandage around his head. “Retold as nonsense. In the original story Mother never wants the boy child to grow up, sees him as young and dependent forever. Independence must be stolen away from mother-hence the golden ball under her pillow.”

“Pretty deep stuff.”

“Pretty fascinating stuff. Mankind depends on its myths to rationalize existence. Pervert the myth and you pervert society.”

“Like Big Red and his mates on the other side of the wall?”

“Exactly. But what was happening there was far more dangerous than just editing a myth. I had suspected that there would be some strong narcogases in the air-and I was right. You and Floyd were glassy-eyed and practically hypnotized into immobility. So it wasn’t just a matter of listening to one more story about the magnetic field of the deep masculine. This was about having a very pernicious and demented theory punched deep into your mind, into your subconscious. You were being brainwashed, thought-controlled-and this sort of crude forced suggestion can do infinite harm. I had to stop it.

“Risking your oŤm life at the same time?”

“Perhaps. But I am sure you would have done the same for me if the circumstances were reversed.”

There was no answering that one. Would I? I smiled, a little grimly. “Can I at least say thanks?”

“You can. Greatly appreciated. So back to work. Now, before the others come, to more pressing business. Since I am now in the open, so to speak, I am relieving Captain Tremearne and taking command of this operation. I am in a better position to kick the cagal out of the chain of command and make sure that your antidote is here instantly. Or sooner. My first imperative order when I took command was to send for it.”

“Then you know about the thirty-day poison? If I might be frank-I can tell you-it has had me pretty worried. Thank you-> >

“Don’t thank me yet. Because I want your assurance that you will stick with this assignment, thirty-day poison or no.”

“Of course I will. I took on this job, got paid, and gave my word I would finish it. The poison was just some bureaucratic moron’s idea of a completion bond.”

“I was sure you would say that. Knew that you would carry on regardless, threat of death or no threat of death.”

Why was I uncomfortable when he said this? This was my old mate Steengo talking. Or was there a strong whiff of the admiral behind his words? Once the military, always the military . . . No, I would not think ill of him. But I better remember that the poison was still churning away. He was smiling widely and I let my smile mirror his. Although, deep inside, the worry and fear still nagged and scratched at my thoughts. Find the artifact, Jim. That is the only way to be sure about the antidote.

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