A CONNECTICUT YANKEE IN KING ARTHUR’S COURT. A WORD OF EXPLANATION. Mark Twain.

“Oh, you tear out my heartstrings.”

” — mdash; wait, I’m not done yet — mdash; Sir Tor, Sir Gauter, Sir Gillimer — mdash; ”

“The very best man in my subordinate nine. What a handy right-fielder he was!”

” — mdash; Sir Reynold’s three brothers, Sir Damus, Sir Priamus, Sir Kay the Stranger — mdash; ”

“My peerless short-stop! I’ve seen him catch a daisy-cutter in his teeth. Come, I can’t stand this!” [Image]

Sir Mordred

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” — mdash; Sir Driant, Sir Lambegus, Sir Herminde, Sir Pertilope, Sir Perimones, and — mdash; whom do you think?”

“Rush! Go on.”

“Sir Gaheris, and Sir Gareth — mdash; both!”

“Oh, incredible! Their love for Launcelot was indestructible.”

“Well, it was an accident. They were simply onlookers; they were unarmed, and were merely there to witness the queen’s punishment. Sir Launcelot smote down whoever came in the way of his blind fury, and he killed these without noticing who they were. Here is an instantaneous photograph one of our boys got of the battle; it’s for sale on every news-stand. There — mdash; the figures nearest the queen are Sir Launcelot with his sword up, and Sir Gareth gasping his latest breath. You can catch the agony in the queen’s face through the curling smoke. It’s a rattling battle-picture.”

“Indeed, it is. We must take good care of it; its historical value is incalculable. Go on.”

“Well, the rest of the tale is just war, pure and simple. Launcelot retreated to his town and castle of Joyous Gard, and gathered there a great following of knights. The king, with a great host, went there, and there was desperate fighting during several days, and, as a result, all the plain around was paved with corpses and cast-iron. Then the Church patched up a peace between Arthur and Launcelot and the queen and everybody — mdash; everybody but Sir Gawaine. He was bitter about the slaying of his brothers, Gareth and Gaheris, and would not be appeased. He notified Launcelot to get him thence, and make swift preparation, and look to be soon attacked. So Launcelot sailed to his Duchy of Guienne with his following, and Gawaine ———————————————————————— Page 340

soon followed with an army, and he beguiled Arthur to go with him. Arthur left the kingdom in Sir Mordred’s hands until you should return — mdash; ”

“Ah — mdash; a king’s customary wisdom!”

“Yes. Sir Mordred set himself at once to work to make his kingship permanent. He was going to marry Guenever, as a first move; but she fled and shut herself up in the Tower of London. Mordred attacked; the Bishop of Canterbury dropped down on him with the Interdict. The king returned; Mordred fought him at Dover, at Canterbury, and again at Barham Down. Then there was talk of peace and a composition. Terms, Mordred to have Cornwall and Kent during Arthur’s life, and the whole kingdom afterward.”

“Well, upon my word! My dream of a republic to be a dream, and so remain.”

“Yes. The two armies lay near Salisbury. Gawaine — mdash; Gawaine’s head is at Dover Castle, he fell in the fight there — mdash; Gawaine appeared to Arthur in a dream, at least his ghost did, and warned him to refrain from conflict for a month, let the delay cost what it might. But battle was precipitated by an accident. Arthur had given order that if a sword was raised during the consultation over the proposed treaty with Mordred, sound the trumpet and fall on! for he had no confidence in Mordred. Mordred had given a similar order to his people. Well, by and by an adder bit a knight’s heel; the knight forgot all about the order, and made a slash at the adder with his sword. Inside of half a minute those two prodigious hosts came together with a crash! They butchered away all day. Then the king — mdash; however, we have started something fresh since you left — mdash; our paper has.” ———————————————————————— Page 401

“No? What is that?”

“War correspondence!”

“Why, that’s good.”

“Yes, the paper was booming right along, for the Interdict made no impression, got no grip, while the war lasted. I had war correspondents with both armies. I will finish that battle by reading you what one of the boys says:

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