Myth-Ing Persons By Robert L Asprin

“Well, the job was originally billed as Dispatcher . . . you know, as in Dispatcher of Nightmares. But anyway, like any job, it turned out to involve a lot of things that aren’t on the job description. Now it’s sort of a combination of dispatcher, travel agent, lost and found, and missing persons bureau.”

“Nightmares?” I questioned, unable to contain myself.

“Sure. Anything that comes out of Limbo, be it dreams or the real thing, comes through here. Where’re you from that you didn’t know that?”

Obviously, I wasn’t wild about continuing on the subject of our place of origin.

“Ahhh, can you really help us find our friend? He’s new in town, like us.”

“That’s right. You’re looking for someone. Sorry. I get a little carried away sometimes when I talk about my work. New in town, hmmm? Shouldn’t be that hard to locate. We don’t get that many visitors.”

“He might be in jail,” Massha blurted out before I realized what she was going to say.

“In jail?” The vampire frowned. “The only outsider in jail right now is. … Say! Now I recognize you! The eyes threw me for a minute. You’re Skeeve, aren’t you?”

“Screen 97B!” he declared proudly, gesturing vaguely over his shoulder. “There’s someone a dozen dimensions over from here, runs a hot dog stand, who features you in his most frequent nightmares. You, a dragon, and a Pervert. Am I correct in assuming that the current resident in our fair jail is none other than your sidekick Aahz?”

“To be correct, that’s Pervect, not Pervert… but except for that you’re right. That’s my partner you’ve got locked up there, and we aim to get him out.”