The American Claimant by Mark Twain

“You may. Thank you. Now you shall have that privilege whenever you are

good.”

Meantime Hawkins had long ago returned and slipped up into the

laboratory. He was rather disconcerted to find his late invention,

Snodgrass, there. The news was told him: that the English Rossmore was

come,

–“and I’m his son, Viscount Berkeley, not Howard Tracy any more.”

Hawkins was aghast. He said:

“Good gracious, then you’re dead!”

“Dead?”

“Yes you are–we’ve got your ashes.”

“Hang those ashes, I’m tired of them; I’ll give them to my father.”

Slowly and painfully the statesman worked the truth into his head that

this was really a flesh and blood young man, and not the insubstantial

resurrection he and Sellers had so long supposed him to be. Then he said

with feeling–

“I’m so glad; so glad on Sally’s account, poor thing. We took you for a

departed materialized bank thief from Tahlequah. This will be a heavy

blow to Sellers.” Then he explained the whole matter to Berkeley, who

said:

“Well, the Claimant must manage to stand the blow, severe as it is.

But he’ll get over the disappointment.”

“Who–the colonel? He’ll get over it the minute he invents a new miracle

to take its place. And he’s already at it by this time. But look here–

what do you suppose became of the man you’ve been representing all this

time?”

“I don’t know. I saved his clothes–it was all I could do. I am afraid

he lost his life.”

“Well, you must have found twenty or thirty thousand dollars in those

clothes, in money or certificates of deposit.”

“No, I found only five hundred and a trifle. I borrowed the trifle and

banked the five hundred.”

“What’ll we do about it?”

“Return it to the owner.”

“It’s easy said, but not easy to manage. Let’s leave it alone till we

get Sellers’s advice. And that reminds me. I’ve got to run and meet

Sellers and explain who you are not and who you are, or he’ll come

thundering in here to stop his daughter from marrying a phantom. But–

suppose your father came over here to break off the match?”

“Well, isn’t he down stairs getting acquainted with Sally? That’s all

safe.”

So Hawkins departed to meet and prepare the Sellerses.

Rossmore Towers saw great times and late hours during the succeeding

week. The two earls were such opposites in nature that they fraternized

at once. Sellers said privately that Rossmore was the most extraordinary

character he had ever met–a man just made out of the condensed milk of

human kindness, yet with the ability to totally hide the fact from any

but the most practised character-reader; a man whose whole being was

sweetness, patience and charity, yet with a cunning so profound, an

ability so marvelous in the acting of a double part, that many a person

of considerable intelligence might live with him for centuries and never

suspect the presence in him of these characteristics.

Finally there was a quiet wedding at the Towers, instead of a big one at

the British embassy, with the militia and the fire brigades and the

temperance organizations on hand in torchlight procession, as at first

proposed by one of the earls. The art-firm and Barrow were present at

the wedding, and the tinner and Puss had been invited, but the tinner was

ill and Puss was nursing him–for they were engaged.

The Sellerses were to go to England with their new allies for a brief

visit, but when it was time to take the train from Washington,

the colonel was missing.

Hawkins was going as far as New York with the party, and said he would

explain the matter on the road.

The explanation was in a letter left by the colonel in Hawkins’s hands.

In it he promised to join Mrs. Sellers later, in England, and then went

on to say:

The truth is, my dear Hawkins, a mighty idea has been born to me within

the hour, and I must not even stop to say goodbye to my dear ones.

A man’s highest duty takes precedence of all minor ones, and must be

attended to with his best promptness and energy, at whatsoever cost to

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