Curious Republic of Gondour by Mark Twain
Curious Republic of Gondour
by Mark Twain
THE CURIOUS REPUBLIC OF GONDOUR AND OTHER WHIMSICAL SKETCHES
NOTE:
Most of the sketches in this volume were taken from a series the author
wrote for The Galaxy from May, 1870, to April, 1871. The rest appeared
in The Buffalo Express.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
THE CURIOUS REPUBLIC OF GONDOUR
A MEMORY
INTRODUCTORY TO “MEMORANDA”.
ABOUT SMELT
A COUPLE OF SAD EXPERIENCES
DAN MURPHY
THE “TOURNAMENT” IN A.D. 1870
CURIOUS RELIC FOR SALE
A REMINISCENCE OF THE BACK SETTLEMENTS
A ROYAL COMPLIMENT
THE APPROACHING EPIDEMIC
THE TONE-IMPARTING COMMITTEE
OUR PRECIOUS LUNATIC
THE EUROPEAN WAR
THE WILD MAN INTERVIEWED
LAST WORDS OF GREAT MEN
THE CURIOUS REPUBLIC OF GONDOUR
As soon as I had learned to speak the language a little, I became greatly
interested in the people and the system of government.
I found that the nation had at first tried universal suffrage pure and
simple, but had thrown that form aside because the result was not
satisfactory. It had seemed to deliver all power into the hands of the
ignorant and non-tax-paying classes; and of a necessity the responsible
offices were filled from these classes also.
A remedy was sought. The people believed they had found it; not in the
destruction of universal suffrage, but in the enlargement of it. It was
an odd idea, and ingenious. You must understand, the constitution gave
every man a vote; therefore that vote was a vested right, and could not
be taken away. But the constitution did not say that certain individuals
might not be given two votes, or ten! So an amendatory clause was
inserted in a quiet way; a clause which authorised the enlargement of the
suffrage in certain cases to be specified by statute. To offer to
“limit” the suffrage might have made instant trouble; the offer to
“enlarge” it had a pleasant aspect. But of course the newspapers soon
began to suspect; and then out they came! It was found, however, that
for once–and for the first time in the history of the republic–
property, character, and intellect were able to wield a political
influence; for once, money, virtue, and intelligence took a vital and a
united interest in a political question; for once these powers went to
the “primaries” in strong force; for once the best men in the nation were
put forward as candidates for that parliament whose business it should be
to enlarge the suffrage. The weightiest half of the press quickly joined
forces with the new movement, and left the other half to rail about the
proposed “destruction of the liberties” of the bottom layer of society,
the hitherto governing class of the community.
The victory was complete. The new law was framed and passed. Under it
every citizen, howsoever poor or ignorant, possessed one vote,
so universal suffrage still reigned; but if a man possessed a good
common-school education and no money, he had two votes; a high-school
education gave him four; if he had property like wise, to the value of
three thousand ‘sacos,’ he wielded one more vote; for every fifty
thousand ‘sacos’ a man added to his property, he was entitled to another
vote; a university education entitled a man to nine votes, even though he
owned no property. Therefore, learning being more prevalent and more
easily acquired than riches, educated men became a wholesome check upon
wealthy men, since they could outvote them. Learning goes usually with
uprightness, broad views, and humanity; so the learned voters, possessing
the balance of power, became the vigilant and efficient protectors of the
great lower rank of society.
And now a curious thing developed itself–a sort of emulation, whose
object was voting power! Whereas formerly a man was honored only
according to the amount of money he possessed, his grandeur was measured
now by the number of votes he wielded. A man with only one vote was
conspicuously respectful to his neighbor who possessed three. And if he
was a man above the common-place, he was as conspicuously energetic in
his determination to acquire three for himself. This spirit of emulation
invaded all ranks. Votes based upon capital were commonly called