Curious Republic of Gondour by Mark Twain

my father. Let us not pry into the result; it was of no consequence to

any one but me.

But the poem I have referred to as attracting my father’s attention and

achieving his favour was “Hiawatha.” Some man who courted a sudden and

awful death presented him an early copy, and I never lost faith in my own

senses until I saw him sit down and go to reading it in cold blood–saw

him open the book, and heard him read these following lines, with the

same inflectionless judicial frigidity with which he always read his

charge to the jury, or administered an oath to a witness:

Take your bow,

O Hiawatha,

Take your arrows, jasper-headed,

Take your war-club, Puggawaugun,

And your mittens, Minjekahwan,

And your birch canoe for sailing,

And the oil of Mishe-Nama.”

Presently my father took out of his breast pocket an imposing “Warranty

Deed,” and fixed his eyes upon it and dropped into meditation. I knew

what it was. A Texan lady and gentleman had given my half-brother, Orrin

Johnson, a handsome property in a town in the North, in gratitude to him

for having saved their lives by an act of brilliant heroism.

By and by my father looked towards me and sighed. Then he said:

“If I had such a son as this poet, here were a subject worthier than the

traditions of these Indians.”

“If you please, sir, where?”

“In this deed.”

“Yes–in this very deed,” said my father, throwing it on the table.

“There is more poetry, more romance, more sublimity, more splendid

imagery hidden away in that homely document than could be found in all

the traditions of all the savages that live.”

“Indeed, sir? Could I–could I get it out, sir? Could I compose the

poem, sir, do you think?”

“You?”

I wilted.

Presently my father’s face softened somewhat, and he said:

“Go and try. But mind, curb folly. No poetry at the expense of truth.

Keep strictly to the facts.”

I said I would, and bowed myself out, and went upstairs.

“Hiawatha” kept droning in my head–and so did my father’s remarks about

the sublimity and romance hidden in my subject, and also his injunction

to beware of wasteful and exuberant fancy. I noticed, just here, that I

had heedlessly brought the deed away with me; now at this moment came to

me one of those rare moods of daring recklessness, such as I referred to

a while ago. Without another thought, and in plain defiance of the fact

that I knew my father meant me to write the romantic story of my half-

brother’s adventure and subsequent good fortune, I ventured to heed

merely the letter of his remarks and ignore their spirit. I took the

stupid “Warranty Deed” itself and chopped it up into Hiawathian blank

verse without altering or leaving out three words, and without

transposing six. It required loads of courage to go downstairs and face

my father with my performance. I started three or four times before I

finally got my pluck to where it would stick. But at last I said I would

go down and read it to him if he threw me over the church for it.

I stood up to begin, and he told me to come closer. I edged up a little,

but still left as much neutral ground between us as I thought he would

stand. Then I began. It would be useless for me to try to tell what

conflicting emotions expressed themselves upon his face, nor how they

grew more and more intense, as I proceeded; nor how a fell darkness

descended upon his countenance, and he began to gag and swallow, and his

hands began to work and twitch, as I reeled off line after line, with the

strength ebbing out of me, and my legs trembling under me:

THE STORY OF A GALLANT DEED

THIS INDENTURE, made the tenth

Day of November, in the year

Of our Lord one thousand eight

Hundred six-and-fifty,

Between Joanna S. E. Gray

And Philip Gray, her husband,

Of Salem City in the State

Of Texas, of the first part,

And O. B. Johnson, of the town

Of Austin, ditto, WITNESSETH:

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