Hit or Myth by Robert Asprin

Badaxe rumbled his salutation as he dropped to one knee with an ease that denied his size. One could almost imagine the skull of a fallen enemy crackling sharply beneath that descending knee. I forced the thought from my mind.

“Greetings, General. Won’t you introduce me to your . . . companion?”

“I … certainly, your Majesty. May I present Massha, Court Magician of Ta-hoe, and friend of both myself and Lord Skeeve, Magician to your own court here at Possiltum.”

“Charmed, your Majesty.”

I realized with a start that Massha was about to attempt to imitate Badaxe by dropping to one knee. Even if she were able to execute such a maneuver, it would require sufficient effort as to invite ridicule from the other court retainers present . . . and somehow I didn’t want that.

“Ah . .. there is no need for that,” I asserted hastily. “It was not our intention to hold formal court here, but rather an informal social occasion.”

That caused a minor stir with the court, including the general who frowned in slight puzzlement. Still, I was already committed to a line of conversation, so I blundered on.

“In fact, that was the only reason for the summons. I wished to meet the lady dazzling enough to lure our general from his usual position by my side.”

“Your Majesty gave his permission for my absence today,” the general protested.

“Quite right. As I said, this is a social gathering only. In fact, there are too many people here for casual conversation. It is our wish that the court be adjourned for the day and the room cleared that I might speak freely with this visiting dignitary.”