Hit or Myth by Robert Asprin

Chapter Ten:

“Superior fire power is an invaluable tool when entering into negotiations.”

– G. PATTON

THE Mob representatives had been housed in one of the less frequented corners of the palace. In theory, this kept them far from the hub of activity while Badaxe and I figured out what to do with them. In fact, it meant that now that I was ready to face them, I had an awfully long walk to reach my destination.

By the time I reached the proper door, I was so winded I wasn’t sure I’d have enough breath to announce my presence. Still, on my walk I had worked up a bit of a mad against the Mob. I mean, who did they think they were, popping up and disrupting my life this way? Besides, I was too unnerved by Queen Hemlock to try anything against her, which left the Mob as the only target for my frustration.

With that in mind, I drew a deep breath and knocked on the door.

I needn’t have worried about announcing myself. Between the second and third knocks, the door opened a crack. My third knock hit the door before I could stop it, but the door remained unmoved by the impact.

“Hey, Shai-ster! It’s the King!”

“Well, let him in, you idiot!”

The door opened wide, revealing one of Shai-ster’s massive bodyguards, then a little wider to allow me entry space past him.

“Come in, come in. your Majesty,” the Mob’s spokesman said, hurrying forward to greet me. “Have a drink . . . Dummy! Get the King something to drink!”

This last was addressed to the second hulking muscleman who heaved himself off the bed he had been sprawled upon. With self-conscious dignity he picked up the end of the bed one-handed, set it down again, then picked up the mattress and extracted a small, flat bottle from under it.