Myth conceptions by Robert Asprin

“Yeah,” I said, trying to sound optimistic. “Maybe I’ll get lucky.”

“It’s going to take more than luck,” Aahz corrected me sternly. “Now, what have you learned watching the king’s advisors?”

“They don’t like each other,” I observed immediately.

“Right!” Aahz sounded surprised and pleased. “Now that means you probably won’t be able to please them both. You’ll have to play up to one of them … or better still insult one. That’ll get the other one on your side faster than anything. Now, which one do you want on your side?”

That was easier than his first question.

“The general,” I said firmly.

“Wrong! You want the chancellor.”

“The chancellor!” I exclaimed, blurting the words out louder than I had intended. “Did you see the size of that axe the general’s carrying?”

“Uh-huh,” Aahz replied. “Did you hear what happened to the guy who interviewed before old Red Cloak here got his turn?”

I closed my eyes and controlled my first sharp remark.

“Aahz,” I said carefully, “remember me? I’m Skeeve. I’m the one who can’t hear whispers a mile away.”

As usual Aahz ignored my sarcasm.

“The last guy didn’t even get a chance to show his stuff,” he informed me. “The chancellor took one look at the crowd he brought with him and asked how many were in his retinue. ‘Eight,’ the man said. ‘Too many!’ says the chancellor and the poor fool was dismissed immediately.”

“So? “I asked bluntly.

“So the chancellor is the one watching the purse strings,” concluded Aahz. “What’s more, he has more influence than the general. Look at these silly walls. Do you think a military man would leave walls half-finished if he had the final say? Somebody decided too much money was being spent constructing them and the project was canceled or delayed. I’m betting that somebody was the chancellor.”