The Tragedy of Pudd’nhead Wilson by Mark Twain

No, Percy Driscoll was the person. He told Chambers that under no

provocation whatever was he privileged to lift his hand against his

little master. Chambers overstepped the line three times, and got

three such convincing canings from the man who was his father and

didn’t know it, that he took Tom’s cruelties in all humility after that,

and made no more experiments.

Outside the house the two boys were together all through

their boyhood. Chambers was strong beyond his years, and a good fighter;

strong because he was coarsely fed and hard worked about the house,

and a good fighter because Tom furnished him plenty of practice–

on white boys whom he hated and was afraid of. Chambers was his

constant bodyguard, to and from school; he was present on the

playground at recess to protect his charge. He fought himself into

such a formidable reputation, by and by, that Tom could have changed

clothes with him, and “ridden in peace,” like Sir Kay in Launcelot’s armor.

He was good at games of skill, too. Tom staked him with marbles to

play “keeps” with, and then took all the winnings away from him.

In the winter season Chambers was on hand, in Tom’s worn-out clothes,

with “holy” red mittens, and “holy” shoes, and pants “holy” at the

knees and seat, to drag a sled up the hill for Tom, warmly clad,

to ride down on; but he never got a ride himself. He built snowmen

and snow fortifications under Tom’s directions. He was Tom’s patient

target when Tom wanted to do some snowballing, but the target couldn’t

fire back. Chambers carried Tom’s skates to the river and strapped

them on him, the trotted around after him on the ice, so as to be on

hand when he wanted; but he wasn’t ever asked to try the skates himself.

In summer the pet pastime of the boys of Dawson’s Landing was to

steal apples, peaches, and melons from the farmer’s fruit wagons–

mainly on account of the risk they ran of getting their heads laid

open with the butt of the farmer’s whip. Tom was a distinguished adept

at these thefts–by proxy. Chambers did his stealing, and got the

peach stones, apple cores, and melon rinds for his share.

Tom always made Chambers go in swimming with him, and stay by him as

a protection. When Tom had had enough, he would slip out and tie knots

in Chamber’s shirt, dip the knots in the water and make them hard to undo,

then dress himself and sit by and laugh while the naked shiverer tugged

at the stubborn knots with his teeth.

Tom did his humble comrade these various ill turns partly out of

native viciousness, and partly because he hated him for his

superiorities of physique and pluck, and for his manifold cleverness.

Tom couldn’t dive, for it gave him splitting headaches.

Chambers could dive without inconvenience, and was fond of doing it.

He excited so much admiration, one day, among a crowd of white boys,

by throwing back somersaults from the stern of a canoe, that it wearies

Tom’s spirit, and at last he shoved the canoe underneath Chambers while

he was in the air–so he came down on his head in the canoe bottom;

and while he lay unconscious, several of Tom’s ancient adversaries saw

that their long-desired opportunity was come, and they gave the false heir

such a drubbing that with Chamber’s best help he was hardly able to drag

himself home afterward.

When the boys was fifteen and upward, Tom was “showing off” in the river

one day, when he was taken with a cramp, and shouted for help.

It was a common trick with the boys–particularly if a stranger

was present–to pretend a cramp and howl for help; then when the

stranger came tearing hand over hand to the rescue, the howler would

go on struggling and howling till he was close at hand, then replace

the howl with a sarcastic smile and swim blandly away, while the

town boys assailed the dupe with a volley of jeers and laughter.

Tom had never tried this joke as yet, but was supposed to be trying

it now, so the boys held warily back; but Chambers believed his master

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