in the seven.
At the time that she was charging the primary student three hundred
dollars for twelve lessons she was not content with this tidy assessment,
but had other ways of plundering him. By advertisement she offered him
privileges whereby he could add eighteen lessons to his store for five
hundred dollars more. That is to say, he could get a total of thirty
lessons in her college for eight hundred dollars.
Four thousand times eight hundred is–but it is a difficult sum for a
cripple who has not been “demonstrated over” to cipher; let it go. She
taught “over” four thousand students in seven years. “Over” is not
definite, but it probably represents a non-paying surplus of learners
over and above the paying four thousand. Charity students, doubtless. I
think that as interesting an advertisement as has been printed since the
romantic old days of the other buccaneers is this one from the Christian
Science Journal for September, 1886:
“MASSACHUSETTS METAPHYSICAL COLLEGE
“REV. MARY BAKER G. EDDY, PRESIDENT
“571 Columbus Avenue, Boston
“The collegiate course in Christian Science metaphysical healing includes
twelve lessons. Tuition, three hundred dollars.
“Course in metaphysical obstetrics includes six daily lectures, and is
open only to students from this college. Tuition, one hundred dollars.
“Class in theology, open (like the above) to graduates, receives six
additional lectures on the Scriptures, and summary of the principle and
practice of Christian Science, two hundred dollars.
“Normal class is open to those who have taken the first course at this
college; six daily lectures complete the Normal course. Tuition, two
hundred dollars.
“No invalids, and only persons of good moral character, are accepted as
students. All students are subject to examination and rejection; and
they are liable to leave the class if found unfit to remain in it.
“A limited number of clergymen received free of charge.
“Largest discount to indigent students, one hundred dollars on the first
course.
“No deduction on the others.
“Husband and wife, entered together, three hundred dollars.
“Tuition for all strictly in advance.”
There it is–the horse-leech’s daughter alive again, after a three-
century vacation. Fifty or sixty hours’ lecturing for eight hundred
dollars.
I was in error as to one matter: there are no charity students. Gratis-
taught clergymen must not be placed under that head; they are merely an
advertisement. Pauper students can get into the infant class on a two-
third rate (cash in advance), but not even an archangel can get into the
rest of the game at anything short of par, cash down. For it is “in the
spirit of Christ’s charity, as one who is joyful to bear healing to the
sick ” that Mrs. Eddy is working the game. She sends the healing to them
outside. She cannot bear it to them inside the college, for the reason
that she does not allow a sick candidate to get in. It is true that this
smells of inconsistency, but that is nothing; Mrs. Eddy would not be Mrs.
Eddy if she should ever chance to be consistent about anything two days
running.
Except in the matter of the Dollar. The Dollar, and appetite for power
and notoriety. English must also be added; she is always consistent, she
is always Mrs. Eddy, in her English: it is always and consistently
confused and crippled and poor. She wrote the Advertisement; her
literary trade-marks are there. When she says all “students” are subject
to examination, she does not mean students, she means candidates for that
lofty place When she says students are “liable” to leave the class if
found unfit to remain in it, she does not mean that if they find
themselves unfit, or be found unfit by others, they will be likely to ask
permission to leave the class; she means that if she finds them unfit she
will be “liable” to fire them out. When she nobly offers “tuition for
all strictly in advance,” she does not mean “instruction for all in
advance-payment for it later.” No, that is only what she says, it is not
what she means. If she had written Science and Health, the oldest man in
the world would not be able to tell with certainty what any passage in it