M.Y.T.H. Inc In Action by Robert Asprin

Tryin’ not to pay too much attention, I watch out of the corner of my eye while Nunzio drapes an arm around Bee’s shoulder and begins to talk to him in an earnest-type fashion, all the while leadin’ him casually behind the weapon storage tent and out of general sight. After what seems like an intolerably long time, “Bee” re-emerges, walkin’ in a rollin’ stride that is very familiar to me, and I know the power of reason and logic has triumphed again. I wait until he is steppin’ up to the firin’ line for yet another try, then commence to create a diversion.

“You’re tryin’ too hard, Spyder,” I sez, loud-like, steppin’ up behind that notable where she is standin’ at the far end of the firin’ line from “Bee.” Both Spyder and Junebug are sporadic in their marksmanship, keepin’ their shots in the vicinity of the target, but only hittin’ it occasionally.

“You’re keepin’ your left arm way too tense … you gotta loosen up a little and just cradle the weapon in your hand. Ease up on the trigger, too. Just use the tip of your finger instead of tryin’ to wrap it all the way around the trigger. Otherwise, you’ll pull your shot off to the left every time you squeeze off a round.”

“Like this?”

“Yeah, only …”

“WHAT THE HECK YA THINK YOU’RE DOIN??!!”

It should have been gratifyin’ to know that I was correct in my appraisal of Sergeant Smiley’s boilin’ point. Up until now, Nunzio and me have been real careful to do our coachin’ of the other recruits out of his sight and hearin’, so’s not to conflict with the authority-type image he is workin’ so hard to maintain. I figure that this open display will not sit well with him, and this figurin’ proves to be dead on target. I should be glad, but as he comes stompin’ toward me I have to fight off the sneakin’ feelin’ that this has not been the wisest tactic to pursue.