weakness, but he seemed to have vanished long ago. K. peered between the girl and the
man standing before him, but could see no sign of the usher. “I fancy,” said the man, who
was stylishly dressed and was wearing a conspicuously smart gray waistcoat ending in two
long sharp points, “that the gentleman’s faintness is due to the atmosphere here, and the
best thing to do — and what he would like best — is not to take him to the sick-room at all,
but out of these offices altogether.” “That’s it!” cried K., so delighted that he almost broke
into the man’s words, “I should feel better at once, I’m sure of it, I’m not so terribly weak
either, I only need a little support under my arms, I won’t give you much trouble, it isn’t
very far after all, just take me to the door, then I’ll sit for a little on the stairs and recover in
no time, for I don’t usually suffer from these attacks, I was surprised myself by this one. I
am an official too and accustomed to office air, but this is really more than one can bear,
you said so yourselves. Will you have the goodness, then, to let me lean upon you a little,
for I feel dizzy and my head goes round when I try to stand up by myself.” And lie lifted
his shoulders to make it easier for the two of them to take him under the arms.
Yet the man did not respond to his request but kept his hands quietly in his pockets
and laughed. “You see,” he said to the girl. “I hit the nail on the head. It’s only here that this gentleman feels upset, not in other places.” The girl smiled too, but tapped the man
lightly on the arm with her finger tips, as if he had gone too far in jesting like that with K.
“But dear me,” said the man, still laughing, “I’ll show the gentleman to the door, of course
I will !” “Then that’s all right,” said the girl, inclining her elegant head for a moment.
“Don’t take his laughter too much to heart,” she said to K., who had sunk again into vacant
melancholy and apparently expected no explanation. “This gentleman — may I introduce
you?” (the gentleman waved his hand to indicate permission) “this gentleman, then,
represents our Information Bureau. He gives clients all the information they need, and as
our procedure is not very well known among the populace, a great deal of information is
asked for. He has an answer to every question, if you ever feel like it you can try him out.
But that isn’t his only claim to distinction, he has another, the smartness of his clothes. We –
– that’s to say the staff — made up our minds that the Clerk of Inquiries, since he’s always
dealing with clients and is the first to see them, must be smartly dressed so as to create a
good first impression. The rest of us, as you must have noticed at once from myself, are
very badly and old-fashionedly dressed, I’m sorry to say; there isn’t much sense anyhow in
spending money on clothes, for we’re hardly ever out of these offices, we even sleep here.
But, as I say, we considered that in his case good clothes were needed. And as the
management, which in this respect is somewhat peculiar, refused to provide these clothes,
we opened a subscription — some of the clients contributed too — and we bought him this
fine suit and some others as well. Nothing more would be needed now to produce a good
impression, but he spoils it all again by his laughter which puts people off.” “That’s how it
is,” said the gentleman ironically, “yet I don’t understand, Fräulein, why you should tell
this gentleman all our intimate secrets, or rather thrust them on him, for he doesn’t want to
hear them at all. Just look at him, he’s obviously much too busy with his own thoughts.” K.
felt no inclination even to make a retort, the girl’s intentions were no doubt good, probably