Dickens, Charles – Reprinted Pieces
upon a purpose, than that which picked out this officer for the
part. Nothing in all creation could have suited him better. Even
while he spoke, he became a greasy, sleepy, shy, good-natured,
chuckle-headed, unsuspicious, and confiding young butcher. His
very hair seemed to have suet in it, as he made it smooth upon his
head, and his fresh complexion to be lubricated by large quantities
of animal food.
‘ – So I – ha, ha, ha!’ (always with the confiding snigger of the
foolish young butcher) ‘so I dressed myself in the regular way,
made up a little bundle of clothes, and went to the public-house,
and asked if I could have a lodging there? They says, “yes, you
can have a lodging here,” and I got a bedroom, and settled myself
down in the tap. There was a number of people about the place, and
coming backwards and forwards to the house; and first one says, and
then another says, “Are you from the country, young man?” “Yes,” I
says, “I am. I’m come out of Northamptonshire, and I’m quite
lonely here, for I don’t know London at all, and it’s such a mighty
big town.” “It IS a big town,” they says. “Oh, it’s a VERY big
town!” I says. “Really and truly I never was in such a town. It
quite confuses of me!” and all that, you know.
‘When some of the journeymen Butchers that used the house, found
that I wanted a place, they says, “Oh, we’ll get you a place!” And
they actually took me to a sight of places, in Newgate Market,
Newport Market, Clare, Carnaby – I don’t know where all. But the
wages was – ha, ha, ha! – was not sufficient, and I never could
suit myself, don’t you see? Some of the queer frequenters of the
house were a little suspicious of me at first, and I was obliged to
be very cautious indeed how I communicated with Straw or Fendall.
Sometimes, when I went out, pretending to stop and look into the
shop windows, and just casting my eye round, I used to see some of
’em following me; but, being perhaps better accustomed than they
thought for, to that sort of thing, I used to lead ’em on as far as
I thought necessary or convenient – sometimes a long way – and then
turn sharp round, and meet ’em, and say, “Oh, dear, how glad I am
to come upon you so fortunate! This London’s such a place, I’m
blowed if I ain’t lost again!” And then we’d go back all together,
to the public-house, and – ha, ha, ha! and smoke our pipes, don’t
you see?
‘They were very attentive to me, I am sure. It was a common thing,
while I was living there, for some of ’em to take me out, and show
me London. They showed me the Prisons – showed me Newgate – and
when they showed me Newgate, I stops at the place where the Porters
pitch their loads, and says, “Oh dear, is this where they hang the
men? Oh Lor!” “That!” they says, “what a simple cove he is! THAT
ain’t it!” And then, they pointed out which WAS it, and I says
“Lor!” and they says, “Now you’ll know it agen, won’t you?” And I
said I thought I should if I tried hard – and I assure you I kept a
sharp look out for the City Police when we were out in this way,
for if any of ’em had happened to know me, and had spoke to me, it
would have been all up in a minute. However, by good luck such a
thing never happened, and all went on quiet: though the
difficulties I had in communicating with my brother officers were
quite extraordinary.
‘The stolen goods that were brought to the public-house by the
Warehouse Porters, were always disposed of in a back parlour. For
a long time, I never could get into this parlour, or see what was
done there. As I sat smoking my pipe, like an innocent young chap,
by the tap-room fire, I’d hear some of the parties to the robbery,