Myth-Nomers & Im-Pervections by Robert Asprin

He gave one last wave, folded his arms, and faded from view.

I stared at the empty space for a few moments, then started the walk back to my hotel alone. I knew where it was . . . what I didn’t know was where Djinger was.

Chapter Fifteen:

“Easy credit terms available . . .”

—SATAN

“I HEAR YOU got jumped last night.”

I paused in mid-move of easing myself into the cab’s back seat to give the cabbie a long stare. “. . . And good morning to you, too, Edvick,” I said dryly. “Yes, thank you, I slept very well.” My sarcasm was not lost on the driver . . . a fact for which I was secretly grateful. Sometimes I have cause to wonder about my powers of communication.

“Hey! Nothing personal. It’s just that people talk, ya know?”

“No, I don’t . . . but I’m learning.”

It seemed that however large and populated Perv appeared to be, there was a thriving network of gossip lurking just out of sight.

I had come down early, hoping to have a chance to talk with J.R., but between my room and the front door I had been stopped by two bellhops and the desk clerk, all of whom knew that I had been in a fight the night before. Of course, they each expressed their sympathies . . . in varying degrees. As I recall, the desk clerk’s sympathy went some thing like “You’re, welcome to use the hotel safe for your valuables, sir . . . but we can’t accept responsibility for any losses.”

Terrific!!

I had rapidly discovered that I wasn’t wild about the idea of my escapade being discussed by the general populace. Especially not since it ended with a session with the police. Even though he had noted my displeasure at discussing the prior night’s incident, Edvick seemed determined not to let the subject die as we started on our way. “I told you you should have gotten a bodyguard,” he lectured. “Carrying that kind of cash around is just askin’ for trouble.”