Sweet MYTH-tery of Life by Robert Asprin

“But isn’t that …” I began, but the troll held up a restraining hand.

“Hear me out,” he said. “Now, continuing with our little saga, eventually passions cool, and the infatuation has run it’s course. It might take years, but eventually they find that ‘just being together’ isn’t enough. It’s time to get on with life. Unfortunately, right about then they discover that they have little if anything in common. All too often they find that their goals in life are different, or, at the very least, their plans on how to achieve them don’t coincide. Then they find, instead of the ideal partner to stand back to back with while taking on the world, they’ve actually opened a second front. That is, they have to spend as much or more time dealing with each other as they do the rest of the world.”

Despite myself, I found I was being drawn in, almost mesmerized, by his oration.

“What happens then?” I said.

“If they are at all rational . . . notice I said ‘rational’ not ‘intelligent’ . . . they go their separate ways. AH too often, however, they cling to the concept of ‘love’ and try to ‘make it work.’ When that happens, the result is an armed camp living an uneasy truce . . . and nobody’s happy … or actually achieving their full potential.”

I thought about the bickering I had recently witnessed between Kalvin and Daphnie, and about what Guido had told me about domestic disturbances and how they can explode into violence. In spite of myself, I shuddered involuntarily.

“That sounds grim,” I said.